Thank you for all the wonderful feedback it really means a lot to me that you like what I write. This chapters a little long but hopefully you like it.

Chapter13: Mirage

She felt cold. As if an artic chill had swept over the planes cabin, leaving her to shiver in its wake. Courtney was narrowly aware of Jason’s pacing, his feet stopping at one end of the carpeting only to start again. It was not supposed to be like this, Carly was not supposed to be in the hospital and Kevin was not supposed to be in Port Charles. Courtney felt numb at the realization, the lapse into selfishness making her swallow the urge to vomit. Jason’s footsteps pounded in her head, loud enough to make her grab at her skull in hopes of calming the painful noises. He saw her frantic movement, for the first time he became fully aware of what lay in front of them, Port Charles would no longer be home but a battle ground. He stepped forward kneeling at her feet and waiting for recognition to shine in her eyes, instead she cradled her head within her arms, dipping it down to shield herself from his pleading eyes. It had all become too much, the thought of Carly lying in a hospital bed, while her and Jason were splashing around in the ocean. Courtney fought against the sickness that overcame her, her pale hand flying to cover her mouth while her feet propelled her past Jason to the plane’s washroom. She shivered her hands barely able to grip the toilet seat, while her entire body shook. Jason stood beyond the door, his nails lightly scraping against the red wood. It was the only thing keeping him from breaking the cheaply made partition down, knowing he needed to keep calm if for nothing more then Courtney’s well being. She could feel the room spinning, her entire body trembling as droplets of sweat formed on her brow. Cradling her knees to her chest, Courtney willed herself to stay conscious despite the blackness beginning to cover her eyes. Pushing herself into an unsteady standing position, her fingers clumsily gripped a brass handle, watching as if transfixed the water begin to gush forth. Jason’s ears pricked at the sound of running water, his entire body tensing while he waited. His hand gripping the handle to turn it, already knowing the lock had been put on. Courtney pulled her head up from the sink, water droplets running down her pale face and pooling on the expensive sweater she was wearing. The sickness created a delirium, everything seeming to appear gray and out of reach. A silent sob passed her lips at the image of Elizabeth in the mirror, looking pale and deadly. Shaking the mirage from her hazy mind, Courtney once again attempted to look into the glass. Only the mirage had not disappeared but came closer standing directly behind the terror stricken blonde. Fear froze her into place, aquamarine eyes staring at the figure with trembling nerves.

“Elizabeth?” Courtney’s body was clammy and cold, a sheen of perspiration forming despite the cold air that seemed to envelope her. The reflection swayed unsteadily in the clear surface, appearing no more menacing then a boat set adrift on a windy day. Letting out a deep breath Courtney tried to once again, demolish the image in her mind. Only Elizabeth seemed to hover, a knife poised above Courtney’s shoulder blade. The blonde’s fist slammed furiously into the mirror, shattered glass flying all around her, narrowly avoiding her face.

“ It wasn’t real” Courtney chanted, her mind adrift with the meaning behind the image, nausea once again gripping her, she fell numbly to her knees narrowly aware of the pounding on the door. Jason felt his calm exterior fade, frazzled and breathing heavily, he pushed his entire weight against the partition, falling into the washroom with stumbling steps. Courtney’s eyes immediately shot up, accusatory and cold, but his eyes were assessing the shards of glass now lying threateningly against the floor. Smudges of blood staining the imitation white tile.

“ Courtney” His sentence ran off when her gaze shot up to his, her blue eyes set afire by an unknown cause.

“You shouldn’t have come in here” The blondes’ voice was unsteady but tough as steel, proving she would do anything to keep him at bay. Her hands dug deeper into the material of her jeans; sharp fingernails leaving traces along the denim. Jason couldn’t form a coherent thought, her blatant dismissal of his help only pushing him further into the enclosed space.

“ Courtney, baby tell me what’s wrong” kneeling in front of her, his shaky hand brushed a strand of sopping hair from her forehead. She shrank back at his touch, trying to push the mass of her body rigid against the wall.

“It’s not real” Courtney mumbled, breath hitching in her throat while more tears began to fall.

“It’s not real” Jason listened closely hoping her words would change, his heart was beating erratically threatening to break through his chest, and all he could do was watch her slowly rock back and forth.

“Courtney” Jason sighed, trying to break through to her, his hands grasping her shoulders in a tight grip, watching her head jerk up, foggy blue eyes clearing momentarily.

“Jason?” As quickly as the realization came something broke inside her, her body tumbling into his, while broken sobs passed her chapped lips.

Brenda sighed, her thin fingers weaving into her tangled curly hair, one hand clutching a steaming Styrofoam cup like a lifeline. Tears had long since stopped making paths down her cheeks, leaving behind a vacant stare. Her lithe frame paced the waiting room endlessly, reality barely registering within her never-ending activity.

“Brenda” Her head shot up at the use of her name, almond eyes staring into Sonny’s charcoal gaze. A moment of discomfort followed, neither knowing what to say.

“Is there any news?” Her voice was so quiet and broken it forced Sonny’s eyes to hers.

“No there’s no news”

She nodded, taking a sip of the rapidly cooling coffee within her hands.

“Look” They began at the same time stumbling to grasp the right words again, with a sigh sonny stuffed his hands within his pants pocket, fixating his gaze on the floor.

Brenda could feel the ghost of a smile playing on her lips at his awkwardness “ She’s going to be okay” This caused his head to jerk up, eyes immediately judging the seriousness of her statement. When she did not continue he nodded, accepting her words without revealing any emotion.

Kevin stood in the background, trying to keep his mind on the present, when all he could feel was the fire growing in the pit of his stomach. An uncontrollable anger threatening to take hold of him, as his mind began to wander towards her. The beautiful blonde that was supposed to be his wife, the stranger he fell in love with that first moment in the park. Sighing, he brought his fist towards the wall, banging against it with little effort. His outburst drew a few stares, mostly nurses used to the dull quiet of the lobby.

 Brenda’s eyes darted upwards peeking over Sonny’s shoulder towards Kevin’s form, hunched over in deep contemplation. Before she could excuse herself from Sonny’s presence, he had moved towards the chairs, he too fell deep in thought. Brenda was left in the middle, clearly out of place in the lobby but not knowing where to go, who to comfort. With bold strides, she reached out her hand tentatively placing it on Kevin’s broad shoulder, feeling him stiffen before turning. Brenda let go of a breath she hadn’t known she had been holding, her hands falling back to her sides. She wasn’t prepared for the malice tinting his aquamarine eyes, directed towards her. Stepping back she shifted awkwardly waiting for him to speak, only he continued to stare down at her, anger etched onto his features as if permanently.

“You were just trying to keep me busy so she could run off with Jason” he stated rhetorically, his thoughts coming together so as to finally give him the full picture. Brenda glanced downwards, hands twisting her shirt into a knot before she finally looked up again.

“You need to know the truth before Courtney comes back”

Jason kneeled by Courtney’s form, his breath hitching within his throat as he unclenched her bloody fists, looking at the cuts that marred her palms. Courtney shut her eyes tightly, the pain assaulting her. She breathed in the scent of copper and it made her stomach lurch unexpectedly, all of her willpower focused on not being sick. Jason placed his palm on her cheek, drawing her into his pained gaze; one she wished was not caused by her.

“You’re going to be alright” He assured, making her wonder who he was trying to convince more, her or himself. Courtney mustered a small smile, hoping to calm the fear that seemed to lace Jason’s words. He could see small shards of glass embedded deeply in her stained flesh, a sharp intake of breath notifying Courtney of his discovery. For a moment, they stared at one another, unsure of what to do next, awkward in their own skin. Courtney slid down onto the floor, burying her head in the crook of his neck. He instantly wrapped his arm around her shivering form, hoping he could solve the problem plaguing her.

“What happened?” She did not pull away to look him in the eyes; she merely mumbled nothing into his shirt collar, hoping to end the on coming questions. He did not give up so easily, his fingers pushing her chin up, their gazes locking.

“Courtney” Jason spoke her name with such love it brought tears to her once vacant stare and she wished more then anything the words to describe what she saw would come to her. Instead, she swallowed back a sob, hesitantly threading her fingers through his hair. Smiling coyly, she stopped the rest of his inquiries with a scorching kiss, his palms slowly gripping the side of her face, one hand tangling in her damp hair. When they finally broke apart, breath ragged and hearts beating erratically, he looked into her eyes, vulnerability clouding the ocean blue orbs. Courtney pulled back standing up on shaky legs, hoping to regain her composure before Jason continued questioning her. When he stood, she tried to move away, hoping the distance would keep her emotions bottled inside. Only his hand on her arm pulled her flush against his chest. His arms working their way around her waist, her mind reeling in the simple sensation of safety he was providing. Courtney’s eyes began to water again and she was thankful her back was to him, shielding her face from his view. Dipping his head down he whispered, “I love you” nuzzling her neck affectionately. He never saw her tears escape, vision blurring the image she had seen earlier.

“Elizabeth” Courtney breathed, immediately regretting her slip as she felt Jason stiffen, his arms loosening their hold to turn her around.

“Courtney why would you say her name?” He looked to be on the verge of tears when he finally saw her broken state. Tears fell rapidly, despite her flurried movement to wipe them away. She felt words escape her, how was she supposed to explain the image; it was a mirage only she saw.

“My mind was just playing tricks on me” The way she played the moment off scared Jason, his hands falling to her shoulders and forcing her to stay still. No matter how she struggled his grip kept her standing in the center of the plane, staring into his eyes with defiance.

“Leave it alone Jason”

Shaking his head he leaned in closer “ Courtney tell me what’s happening”

“I can’t”

“Please” She could not stand the way he begged, his eyes moistening visibly while he urged her to bare her soul.

“Just leave it alone, I can take care of myself” She finally worked up the strength to push his hands off her shoulders, her body finally free to collapse onto the couch. She continued to fight off tears refusing to look at him while he stood rooted in spot in front of her, staring at her in bewilderment.

Jason finally let out an exasperated breath, hands running through his hair in defeat.

“I’m not going anywhere, I won’t push but you can’t push me away, I wont let you”

Courtney peered up at him her whole body yearning to be held again, to feel secure in his embrace. His words echoed in her head like the distant voice of a conscience, prodding her to make the right decision. She pushed it away taking solace in the fact that no matter what he would always love her, for once she found herself thinking if that would be enough, if love could really conquer all.

Brenda leaned back in the plastic waiting room chair, trying to get comfortable.

“So they were supposed to get a divorce” Kevin spoke quietly, hope lingering in his exhausted form. Brenda looked away squinting to see through the low light towards the nurses’ station where Sonny stood rigidly.

“Does she still love him? Her eyes slowly drifted back to his, noticing the dread creeping into his words and replacing the steadily declining hope.

“I can’t tell you that, I’m not her” Brenda lied, a sad smile gracing her crimson lips, before disappearing as quickly as it arrived.

Kevin looked unconvinced his whole body tensing at the sight of Brenda’s’ waning attention.

“ I need to know if Jason stole my fiancée” Aquamarine clashed with toffee when she finally gazed directly at him, an eyebrow raised in calm contemplation.

“If they are together, it’s because Jason found the love of his love again, not because he stole her. You have to remember she was his wife long before she was your fiancée” Her cool tone stayed steady and deadly as she spoke, alerting Kevin to the anger his statement had stirred deep within the brunette.

“She will never choose me” Kevin stated, glancing upwards towards Brenda for confirmation, she only stared at him unmoving and unfeeling, breaking the contact to move towards Sonny who had begun to bark orders at the nurses. Kevin caught her wrist, stopping the sudden movement and forcing her eyes back to his.

“You didn’t answer” She glanced at his hand, grip loosening instantly as if she was in pain.

Shrugging Brenda pulled her hand free “I didn’t think I had to” The words were spoken in a deadly calm voice, one that chilled Kevin’s heart with it’s lack of emotion. He wanted to look in her eyes and see the Brenda he had come to know but she was already gone, taking with her the last lingering bit of hope he had.

Courtney Felt Jason trailing behind her, barely keeping up with her hurried pace. When she finally reached the hospital lobby, her heart seemed to plummet. It was real, Carly was really in the hospital, and Sonny and Brenda’s disheveled states were proof of that. Jason came to an awkward halt behind her, surprised at her pause mid-step.

“I can’t do this I can’t be here” Her whispered words caused tears to sting at her eyes.

“Jason, how is the baby” Courtney felt her heart clench at the sadness that streaked across his face. She knew before he spoke, their baby was gone, the little life she wanted no more then to nurture and love had been stolen from her. Courtney ripped at her I.V. tugging it out with a harsh intake of breath, the pain barely registering in numbed state.

“Courtney what are you doing?” Jason’s voice cracked his breaths uneven as he tried to hold in the tears that threatened to spill from his eyes. He had been dreading this moment; it was when everything became real. Courtney moved about busying herself with picking up the clothes folded on the floor. She dropped the garments quickly moving away from the pile with wide blue eyes.

‘My blood” Her hand shot to cover her mouth, the dull thud of her heart echoing through the room.

He looked at her face ghostly white, and drenched with the trails of hot tears.

“Courtney”

“Our baby, Jason our baby’s gone” It seemed to be the last stone shattering her glass house until she was a crumpled heap of sobs sliding along the wall towards the floor. He slid with her, arms secured around her waist.

“I’m so sorry, I’m so sorry” She repeated the words as if it was a mantra and all he could do was shush her constant apology.

“It’s not your fault”

“Our baby boy…” She turned burying her head in the crook of his neck in hopes it would quiet her sobs. Only Jason could hear them and through his constant whispering he felt his own tears escape, unobserved by Courtney who was rocking in his arms her whole body quivering.

Courtney jerked back to reality trying to no avail to clear her hazy gaze. She could feel her body slipping, words yelled somewhere in the distance, all while he held her steady. Black began overtaking the scenery, huddled figures trying desperately to reach her. Only they couldn’t, not before she slipped from consciousness.

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