Journey Online

Summary: Jason has just ended it with Courtney...will he decide to stand up to Sonny or let his heart be broken?

Author's Note: Just to let you all know, this was my take on two things I would have liked to see done differently on GH. First, the way Jason told Courtney he loved her and second, how this breakup has been handled lately. This is just my take on those two events.

Jason sighed as he turned his bike off and let his head fall into his arms. The past week had been hell for him. His days went by in a daze; everything and everyone no longer mattered. Why had he let her go? Why couldn’t he have been more stubborn to Sonny? He knew in his heart he could protect Courtney from all the dangers in his life. Then why hadn’t he been able to tell Sonny that? Because he was too damn loyal, that’s why. His loyalty to Sonny always came first, even if it meant his heart had to be broken for it.

Yes, his heart had broken. He ached every moment of the day. Seeing Courtney earlier that night at the loft when he had gone to get his things had nearly killed him. The ache that he carried with him daily nearly reached its breaking point when he saw the woman he loved with tears in her eyes, asking him if he wanted her sent away to an out of state college. He had wanted to scream no right then and there, hold her in his arms, and tell her how much he loved her and how he couldn’t live without her in his life. It took all of his strength to hold his tears back - seeing her so hurt had only made his pain worse. It broke his heart to know that he had put her in so much pain. Mustering up all the strength in his body, he walked out of the loft, leaving Courtney, his Courtney, alone and heartbroken.

And now here he was. Alone, on his bike. Jason’s mind drifted to the past few months. Words couldn’t clearly describe the amount of happiness Courtney had brought him in those months. Her smile, the way her eyes sparkled when she’d laugh, her strength, the way she’d always shyly tuck a piece of hair behind her ear; thinking about her brought a smile to his face. She had made him a better person. She had taught him how to love - as much as he had tried to deny it, the fact was that he had fallen in love with her. Slowly, but surely, she had won his heart. His mind drifted to the night he had first told her he loved her…

They had both finished dinner and were now sitting by the fireplace, Courtney leaning back into Jason’s arms as they watched the fire. Jason placed small kisses on Courtney’s neck as she talked about Carly’s new club.

“I don’t know how she makes all these decisions. Fabric, décor, colors, it’d drive me-“ Courtney stopped herself and giggled. “You’re not listening to a single word I’m saying are you?” she said as she sat up and turned around to face him.

Jason smiled sheepishly as he shook his head no. “But can you blame me?” he asked as he pulled her closer and kissed her softly on the lips.

“Hmmm…I don’t know. I might need some convincing,” she said, smiling slyly.

Jason smiled as he brushed his lips against Courtney’s, teasing her, before kissing her passionately. Courtney responded, opening Jason’s mouth with her tongue. With one of her hands on the nape of Jason’s neck, Courtney moved her other hand around his waist. Jason carefully inched Courtney’s t-shirt up, placing his palm on her lower back as his other hand cupped the side of her face. He moved his lips from hers and onto her neck, as his hand inched upward. Courtney tugged at the bottom of his shirt, needing to feel his skin against hers.

Jason reluctantly pulled away and looked at her. “Are you sure?” he hoarsely whispered.

He responded by kissing her deeply. He pulled his own shirt over his head, and then reached over as he pulled Courtney’s t-shirt over her head. The sight of her was breathtaking. He stood up, pulling her up with him, and carried her into the bedroom. As he laid her on the bed, he climbed on top. He kissed her forehead, both her eyes, and softly kissed her on the lips before looking her in the eyes and whispering, “I love you.”

Courtney looked at him wide-eyed, not sure if she had heard him correctly. Jason flinched at her silence, wondering if he had taken it too far. “You what?” Courtney asked.

“I…I love you,” Jason replied. There was so much he wanted to tell her. How she made days brighter with her smile; how he looked forward to seeing her, holding her in his arms, and listening to her talk; how no matter how hard he tried, she was all he thought about; how she had changed him, made him happier. But he couldn’t find the right words. He had never been good at expressing himself, and he didn’t know how else to express how he felt for her, other than simply telling her the truth; he loved her.

Courtney smiled, blinking back tears. She held his face in her hands and brought him closer before whispering. “I love you too.” She kissed him, her tongue dancing with his. She had waited so long to hear those words, and now that she had finally heard them, she never wanted to let him go.

Jason held her tightly as he made love to her, not wanting to ever let go of the beautiful woman he had been blessed to fall in love with…

Every moment of that night played out in Jason’s mind over and over again. He remembered every detail as if it had been last night. How tightly Courtney had grabbed onto his shoulders, how they had whispered sweet words to each other all night, how angelic she had looked the next morning as he watched her sleep. Tears came to Jason’s eyes as the memory continued to consume him.

How was he supposed to go on for the rest of his life without her? It was then and there that he realized he didn’t have to. Courtney was more than willing to fight for him - why couldn’t he do the same for her? Sonny would be furious - but he would have to understand. Sonny had asked Jason to choose between him and Courtney, and now, Jason realized that he had made the wrong decision. He needed Courtney in his life, and if that meant breaking his loyalty to Sonny, that was a risk he would have to take. Lord knows she was worth it. With a new resolve in mind, he turned his bike on and headed straight to the loft.

Slowly opening the door to the loft, the first thing Jason noticed was the pile of bags near the door. He recognized them as Courtney’s and wondered if he had missed her, if she had already left the loft. As if on cue, Courtney walked into the room, from the bedroom. Her eyes were red and puffy; it was obvious she had been crying.

With fresh tears coming to her eyes, she looked at Jason and asked, “Jason, what are you doing here?”

Jason took a step toward her and instead of answering her question, asked her “What’s going on? Are you leaving?”

Courtney sighed and said, “Did you honestly think I’d stay here without you? Yes, I’m leaving Jason. It hurts me too much to be here without you. My heart would break every single moment that I was here without you.” Tears began to spill from her eyes as she went on, “I just need to finish packing my stuff…why did you come back? Did you forget something?”

He slowly walked towards Courtney, with tears in his eyes. He placed his hand on her chin, forcing her to look up at him, and whispered “Yes…I forgot something,” before kissing her softly on the lips. Courtney sighed into the kiss, not believing what was happening.

She quickly pulled away, and looked at Jason. “What are you trying to tell me?”

Jason pulled her over to the couch and sat her down. Holding her hands in his, he looked down at their entwining hands as he spoke. “Courtney…I am so sorry. When Sonny told me to end our relationship, I did it out of loyalty to him. It was the hardest thing for me to do, but I really thought I was doing the right thing…even if it meant I had to break my heart.” Tears came to his eyes again. “These past few days have been horrible Courtney. No matter how hard I try, I can’t stop hurting. And I know it’s been just as bad for you. It kills me to know how much pain I’ve put you through.”

Courtney squeezed his hands lightly and whispered, “Jason, what are you saying?”

“I’m saying that I love you,” Jason replied, “And that I should have never listened to Sonny’s orders. I need you in my life, and if that means I have to fight for you, then I will. Please tell me you’ll forgive me for hurting you and that you’ll give me a second chance.”

Courtney smiled through her tears and placed her hands on both sides of Jason’s face. She pulled him close and whispered, “Of course I forgive you. Jason, I love you.” And she kissed him passionately, as Jason quickly responded.

Breathlessly, Jason pulled away and said, “We need to tell Sonny.” Courtney nodded, got up to grab her purse, and the two slowly made their way out the door.

Getting off the elevator at Harborview Towers, a sense of uneasiness came over Courtney. She stopped in her tracks, forcing Jason to stop with her. “Jason, I’m scared. I know I shouldn’t be…I mean I’ve approached Sonny before about us, but I don’t know…now I’m scared.”

Jason softly kissed her and said, “Don’t worry about it. Yes he’s going to be angry. Yes, he’ll probably yell. But we’ll get through it. I am going to be right next to you the entire time. We’ll get through this - we need to. Come what may, we’ll get through it. The only thing that matters is that I love you and you love me - that’s what’s going to get us through this.”

Courtney smiled, “You’re right.” She hesitated slightly before asking, “Are you sure about your decision?”

Jason leaned down, kissing her neck once before whispering in her ear, “I have never been more sure in my entire life.”

Title: Here With Me
Author: Jafreen

Feedback: Jafreen3585@hotmail.com
Rating: R
Category: Short
Type: Romance
Summary: Sequel to Come What May - Will Sonny relent and give Jason and Courtney his blessing?

Sonny’s _expression hardened after opening the door. Seeing Jason and Courtney holding hands angered Sonny to no end - hadn’t he warned Jason to stay away? Jason quietly and calmly said to Sonny, “We need to talk.”

Letting them in, Sonny paced around before pouring himself a drink. Jason could sense his anger and knew to keep silent for now. He would let Sonny speak first.

“Courtney - go upstairs and see what Carly’s up to. I want to speak to Jason alone for a minute.” Sonny looked expectantly at his sister, waiting for her to leave the room.

Surprising both Jason and Sonny, Courtney deftly replied, “I’m sorry Sonny, I’m not leaving. We all know that you don’t want to discuss business with Jason, something I know I stay out of. This time, I’m involved. This is about Jason and me, and whether you like it or not, I’m staying.” Jason turned to her, questioning her with his eyes - was she sure? She nodded slowly and squeezed his hand to reassure him.

Sonny sighed, and the room was silent. The silence was awkward, filled with tension. In a sudden fit of anger, Sonny raised the glass he was holding and threw it against the wall. Courtney tensed at his sudden outburst and Jason brought her closer, putting his arm around her waist, to comfort her, letting her know everything would be okay.

In what sounded like nervous laughter, Sonny chuckled, before his face grew dark. “I told you two, this had to end…and I meant it. I knew you would hurt, hell I knew you’d be angry - angry with me. But I was willing to go through it. This can’t happen. It is way too dangerous for you to be together. And now what? You come in here, hand in hand, and what do you think is going to happen? You think that you can convince me to change my mind? That with a few words I’m going to make the biggest mistake of my life and let you two see each other?” He closed his eyes and leaned his head back before looking at them again, “No,” he said “No…THIS WON’T HAPPEN.”

Jason waited a moment, to make sure Sonny had finished, before he spoke, “Sonny, for as long as I can remember, I have remained loyal to you. You are one of my best friends, and no matter what you have asked of me, I have always complied. Dammit Sonny, I even married Brenda, someone I hate, just for you. I have never, ever asked you for anything, and for the first time, I am. I love Courtney…and she loves me. When you first told me to end it, I did. I broke my heart and I broke hers, just so I could follow your order. I can’t do it anymore. Do you even know how hellish this past week has been for me?? I can’t go on like this. I need her in my life - I know there are risks, but hell Sonny, I am more than willing to take them - so is Courtney. I can protect her, and take care of her - I promise. Please, Sonny - I need her.”

“If you loved her, you would walk away from her - you know better!” Sonny bellowed. His anger had taken over, and remaining calm was no longer an option. “You are my enforcer - it is your job to kill those that get in my way. How can you even think of subjecting my sister to a life like that? What were you thinking? It is way too dangerous and there is no way I am going to let this happen. How dare you--”

Sonny was interrupted as Courtney spoke up for the first time, “Sonny what are you saying?” Her voice remained calm as she tried her best to keep her composure. Tears began to form in her eyes as she controlled her anger, “Does this make you happy? To see your best friend and your sister, at your mercy, begging you for your blessing? Does it give you a sick kind of ego boost?” At this point, tears were streaming down Courtney’s face. “I love Jason, and I am not going to let him go - why can’t you let us be happy? Why don’t you want us to be happy?”

Jason reached for Courtney’s hand, and then spoke up once again, “Sonny, I am asking you for your blessing. But know this. If you don’t give us your blessing, it won’t stop me. For the first time in my life, I need someone, and I am not about to let her go. I am begging you not to make me choose, but if it comes down to that, I will have to choose Courtney.”

Sonny was silent for a moment, not believing what he had just heard. “No…this will NOT happen. Say what you want now, but believe me, I will end this. It’s just too dangerous, for both of you” He sighed, putting his face in his hands before speaking again, “You two need to understand me - it’s the best choice for everyone involved, if this doesn’t happen. It just can’t. I wish things could have been different, but they’re not. Jason, you and Courtney can NOT be together - you just can’t.”

Saying nothing more, Jason glanced at Courtney. Wiping the tears from her eyes, he whispered, “We should go.” Turning back to Sonny, Jason quietly said, “Sonny, I’ve made my decision. I’m sorry - I didn’t want it to be this way either.” With nothing more to say, Jason and Courtney walked out of the penthouse, leaving Sonny to stand there, in disbelief.

His anger had subsided, and now Sonny was hurt. How had he let things go this way? Why couldn’t he have noticed Jason’s feelings earlier, so that he could have stopped this before Jason fell in love with Courtney? Carly had hinted many times, but he had brushed her off, not taking her seriously. Now he wished he had taken her seriously - then none of this would have happened. Dammit!

Lost in his thoughts, Sonny didn’t notice as Carly slowly made her way down the stairs. While upstairs, she had listened to everything that had happened, and had purposefully chosen not to come downstairs. This was something the three of them needed to work out, and the last thing any of them needed was her input. For once in her life, Carly knew that she needed to shut up and let them work it out on their own. Part of her couldn’t help but smile as she had listened to Jason stand up to Sonny. It was about time - Sonny had been completely unreasonable ever since learning about Courtney and Jason, and hearing Jason stand to Sonny reaffirmed to Carly how much he really loved Courtney. Courtney was exactly what Jason needed - someone who could look past his work and love him for who he is, someone who needed Jason just as much as he needed her. In the months of being with Courtney, Carly had noticed a change in Jason - one for the better. And for the first time, Jason was embracing his newfound happiness and running with it. Good for him.

“I guess we should get someone here to clean up this mess,” Carly said, pointing to the shattered pieces of glass on the floor. Her words jerked Sonny back to reality as he realized that Carly had entered the room. He only nodded at Carly’s statement and sat on the couch. She joined him, placing her hand on his shoulder before continuing, “Sonny, I tried to tell you this before, and I’m saying it again. No matter what you do, you can’t keep those two apart. Why can’t you just let them be happy? Can’t you see how much they love each other? Jason has just risked losing you so that he can stay with Courtney. Doesn’t that even hint to you how much she means to him?”

Sonny slowly nodded before saying, “But Carly…it’s too dangerous. I can see how much he loves her - every time I look at him, I see it. But how am I supposed to let my sister into this world with a clean conscience? Knowing the risks? Knowing what might happen? How am I supposed to do that? If anything ever happened to Court--”

Carly stopped Sonny, placing two fingers on his lips. “Stop it. Yes, loving men like you and Jason is a risky thing. But don’t you see? Your sister is strong and she is more than willing to take those risks. I’ll tell you one thing - she’s a hell of a lot smarter than me and I know she won’t make the same stupid mistakes that I’ve made.” Sonny laughed quietly at Carly’s blunt statement. “You need to give them your blessing. They deserve to be happy, just like you’ve been happy with Michael and me. I know, being involved is a risk - but I love you Sonny, and being with you makes every moment of fear, every dangerous moment, worth it - and I know Courtney feels the same way. She is so good for Jason; she makes him happy.” Carly leaned down and snuggled into Sonny as he wrapped his arms around her. “Look at how miserable they’ve been this past week. And its worse when they see each other; you can just look in their eyes and tell how much they’re hurting - and now they’ve stood up to you. Whether you approve or not, they’re going to be together. Sonny, I’m begging you, give them your blessing. They’ll never be truly happy without it.” Sonny stroked Carly’s hair and nodded, knowing what he had to do.

Courtney looked out the window at the loft, lost in thought. Her heart knew she and Jason had done the right thing…then why did she feel so scared? Why was she so worried? She had prayed for Sonny to change his mind, but he was too damn stubborn. Tears slowly fell, as she remembered the earlier confrontation. She was happy Jason had chosen to be with her…she was. But she also knew that Jason was hurting. She knew standing up to Sonny like that had been extremely hard on him, and it broke her heart to know that she had put him in that position. Suddenly, a pair of strong arms wrapped around Courtney’s waist, and she sighed as she leaned back into Jason’s strong frame.

Kissing her temple, Jason asked “Courtney what’s wrong?” He noticed the tears on her face and was worried.

She turned to Jason, with her arms around his neck and looked down as she replied, “Jason…do you regret what happened this afternoon?” Jason looked at her confused, as she went on. “I know it hurt for you to stand up to Sonny. It was hard for me, but I know it was probably hundreds of times harder for you. I just…I need to know. Do you regret choosing us?”

Jason lifted Courtney’s face to look up at him before replying, “Don’t ever say that. I could never regret choosing you.” He smoothed her hair with hands as he went on, “I love you. And yes, it was very hard for me to stand up to Sonny - but he needs to realize that I’m not going to let him take you away from me again - he did it once, and it nearly killed me. I can’t let him do it again - I won’t let him.” Bringing her over to the couch, Jason held Courtney close. He ran his arm along the side of her frame, as her fingers entwined and played with his.

Courtney looked up at Jason, and brought his lips to hers. Kissing her softly, Jason soon deepened the kiss, as Courtney leaned back, bringing Jason down with her. Jason’s fingers ran along Courtney’s waist, where a piece of flesh was revealed from the bottom of her shirt to the top of her jeans. Courtney ran her fingers through Jason’s hair, as her tongue danced with his. Sitting up, Jason carried Courtney into the bedroom, placing her on top of the bed. On her knees, she faced him, as he remained standing on the side of the bed. Never breaking the kiss, Jason slowly unbuttoned her blouse, and with one swift moment, unclasped her bra. Courtney broke the kiss for one moment, as she lifted Jason’s t-shirt over his head. Slowly leaning Courtney back onto the bed, Jason reached for her belt as Courtney did the same to him…

The night was blissful, as Jason made love to Courtney. He told her throughout the night how much he loved her, and held her tight as they exchanged loving words. How had he even considered letting this angel leave his life? As Courtney slept in his arms, Jason watched her - she was beautiful. He promised himself, he would always protect her and love her and treat her the way she deserved to be treated. He felt blessed to have been given a chance to love and be loved - with someone who he now knew he wanted to spend the rest of his life with. Yes, he now knew. He wanted nothing more than to spend his entire life with Courtney. Smiling at the though, he wrapped his arms around her tightly and kissed her on the temple one last time before drifting off to sleep.

Knocking on Sonny’s door the next morning, Jason prayed Sonny’s anger had subsided a bit. Courtney had gone to work, and Jason thought he would try one more time to speak to Sonny. He knew Sonny was furious…but he needed to try again. He needed to talk to Sony alone this time, one best friend to another.

“Jason,” Sonny said as he opened the door, “It’s actually a good thing you stopped by. I was going to call you later on in the morning.”

Jason stepped into the penthouse, a million thoughts running through his head. Well Sonny wasn’t angry anymore…this was obvious. Could he have changed his mind? Doubtful. One could always hope, Jason thought to himself.

“Sonny,” Jason began, “I haven’t changed my mind about Courtney…I just. I need you to understand - I love her. And I am going to do everything I can to make sure that she is safe and nothing happens to her. I tried to end it with her - I did. But Sonny, those few days were hell for me. Every time I would see her, I would ache inside, knowing that I couldn’t be with her. She is the best thing that has ever happened to me, and I can’t lose her. She means too much to me. I am asking you one more time for your blessing - it’s important to me, but honestly, it’s even more important to Courtney. No matter what she says, I know deep inside, it’s hurting her that her own brother doesn’t approve. And I know she feels bad for putting me in a position where I have to choose between you and her. She wants your approval…and so do I.”

“I know,” Sonny softly replied.

“You have to under--,” Jason stopped himself as the realization of what Sonny had just said hit him. “What?”

“I said, I know.” Sonny sat on the couch, motioning Jason to sit in the chair facing him. Taking a deep breath, Sonny continued, “You got to understand Jason - I was looking out for Courtney’s safety. I thought I was doing both her and you a favor by telling you to end it. The last thing I want is for what happened with Lily and me to happen to you two. But I’ve been thinking…and I’ve realized that you two are different. I know you care about her, a lot. And I know she cares about you too. I originally thought what I was doing was in Courtney’s best interest. But I’ve realized, it is in Courtney’s best interest to be with you. And the same goes for you. You two are good for each other, and more than anything else, you need each other. I’m just sorry it took me so long to figure it out.” Sonny stood up, as did Jason. “You keep her safe,” Sonny said, “I know you will…I’m happy for both of you.”

Jason walked over to Sonny, and quietly said, “Thank you Sonny - while I’m here, I have another question for you.”

Confused, Sonny asked, “What’s up? What do you need?”

Jason smiled as he said, “Let’s just say I have another blessing to ask for.”

Stepping into the loft after a long shift at Kelly’s, the first thing Courtney noticed was the arrangement of candles throughout the loft. She smiled as she saw a bottle of champagne being chilled, with a single rose lying next to it. Taking a seat, she looked around, wondering what Jason was up to. It was then that she noticed the small box next to the rose and the note underneath it. As she reached for the box and note, she felt a strong pair of arms wrap around her shoulders. Jason kissed her earlobe and Courtney turned to him and grinned. “Jason what are you up to?” she asked, “What’s all this about?”

Jason took a seat next to her, and with her hands in his, he began, “I went to go see Sonny today,” Courtney’s eyes widened, wondering what had happened. “He said he’s thought about it, and…he’s given us his blessing. He realizes he was wrong, and wants us to be happy.”

Courtney squealed and threw her arms around Jason’s neck. “Jason! Do you mean we can be together, and not have to hide? He really approved?!”

Jason smiled and answered, “Yes, Sonny approved.”

She smiled and said, “How did you convince him? What’d you say?”

Jason rubbed his face with his hands and slowly replied, “You know…I didn’t say anything. Something must have happened after we left. All I know, is that when I went to him this morning, he was okay with us being together.” Jason smiled as he continued, “So…onto other things…”

Courtney smiled as her eyes went back to the note and box. Before she could say anything, Jason reached for the two items and began speaking again. “I’ve never really been good with words…it’s never been easy for me. There’s so much I wanted to tell you, so much I wanted you to know. So I wrote it down in this note.” He handed Courtney the note. Smiling at Jason, Courtney began to read:

How can I even begin to describe how much you mean to me? In the past few months, you have given me more happiness, more joy than I had ever known my entire life. I look forward to seeing you every day and waking up with you every morning. You once told me I was the best thing that had ever happened to you - the truth is, you are the best thing that has ever happened to me. I love you more than words can describe, and every day, I thank god for giving me the chance to love and be loved by you. What we’ve been through this past week has shown me how much I truly need you in my life. I can’t see my future without you in it. I want you in our loft, today and every day after, here with me. What I’m asking you is…will you marry me?

With tears in her eyes, Courtney softly kissed Jason before replying, “Yes Jason. Of course I’ll marry you.” Jason smiled, and opened the box he had been holding. In it was a breathtaking ring, a large square diamond set in the center, with two smaller heart-shaped diamonds on either side.

He slid the ring onto Courtney’s finger, and softly whispered, “Perfect fit.” He leaned over, and kissed Courtney passionately, holding her face in his hands. She pulled away, smiled at him, and snuggled into his arms. Holding Courtney tight, Jason smiled to himself as he thought about how lucky he was. He kissed her on the top of her head, and the two sat in silence, thinking about the future and all the possibilities that lay ahead for them.

Title: A Sorta Fairytale - Part III: Come Away With Me

Feedback: jafreen3585@hotmail.com

Jason couldn’t help but smile to himself as he made his way to Kelly’s to pick Courtney up. He had smiled more in the past two days than he could ever remember. How had he become so lucky? He was happy with a beautiful girl who had agreed to become his wife. The whole idea of being this happy was foreign to Jason and often, he would stop himself and shake his head, not believing that any of it was real.

Walking into Kelly’s, Jason’s eyes scanned the place, looking for Courtney. Not seeing her, he assumed she was in the back, and sat down at a table to wait for her. Knowing she was working a late shift tonight, he had told her he would pick her up. She had protested, claiming she could get to the loft on her own. Jason knew she was very well capable of doing so…but the protective side in him wanted to make sure she was safe, and besides, walking with her meant he’d be able to spend more time with her, instead of waiting for her at the loft…something he hated doing. Every moment without her was a restless one…this feeling of anxiousness and restlessness was new to him. He had never known he could want someone, need someone, this much.

Seeing Jason’s persistence, and knowing this would be a losing battle, Courtney had simply shaken her head and smiled, as she agreed to let Jason pick her up.

“She left a couple hours ago,” the harsh voice jerked Jason back to reality.

Looking up, he saw Elizabeth, glaring at him as she poured another customer some coffee. “Bobbie decided that she needed some time off, so she let her go.”

“Thanks Elizabeth,” Jason said, as he got up to leave. “Thanks for telling me.”

“Don’t bother thanking me,” Elizabeth shot back. “I just want to get you out of here - why don’t you go find your perfect little mob girlfriend?

Maybe she’s waiting for you at your secret hideout.” Elizabeth continued to glare at Jason, waiting for a response.

Not wanting to even waste his effort with her, Jason turned and left, not looking back.Where was she? Jason had searched all over Port Charles, looking for Courtney. He had gone back to the loft, even checked her old apartment. She wasn’t answering her cell phone, and now Jason was worried. He had even become as desperate to call A.J. to see if he knew anything - A.J. hadn’t seen Courtney all night. Different scenarios began running through his mind, causing Jason to search even harder. He had called Sonny to let him know Courtney was missing - Sonny had sent out Marco and the rest of the guys to search, and so far no one had turned up with anything. Where could she be? Jason tried her cell phone again.“Hey, it’s Courtney,” her voice mail message began, “I’m not at my phone - leave a message and I’ll get back to you!” Her bright and happy voice only worried Jason more, as he wondered what could have happened to her.

“Courtney, it’s Jason. I’m worried about you. Where are you? Call me as soon as you can. I love you.” Putting away his phone, Jason sighed and looked out into the river. Standing on the docks, he thought about where she could have gone. A thought came to him, but he attempted to brush it off, not wanting to think of that possibility. He hesitated, before realizing what he had to do. Although the thought terrified him, he knew he had to check. He took out his phone and called the last place he wanted to find her

Storming through the halls of the hospital, Jason ran to the nearest nurse. “What room is Courtney Matthews in?” he asked, his eyes filled with fear and worry. He had called Sonny and Carly as soon as he had found out Courtney had been admitted into the hospital. He knew they’d arrive soon, but right now his main concern was Courtney - he needed to see her, he needed to know she would be all right.The nurse looked into her notes, and pointed toward a different hallway.

“Room O-24 - down the hall and to the left.”Jason ran through the hallway to find Tony shutting the door to Courtney’s room. “Tony, what’s going on? What happened to Courtney.

Is she okay?”Tony put his hand on Jason’s shoulder before responding, “Jason, she was hit by a car. It was a complete accident - the driver was the one who brought her in. We’ve been trying to reach Sonny for hours but he hasn’t been home.”

‘He was out searching for Courtney,’ Jason thought to himself.

Tony continued, “She suffered severe head trauma. The next 48 hours are critical. If she doesn’t wake up, she might go into a full-fledged coma. We’re going to be keeping an eye on her, and monitoring her progress.”

With tears in his eyes, Jason asked, “Can I see her?”

Tony nodded, “You know I think it would be good for her to have you by her side. But no one else. We can’t bombard her with too many visitors.”

Nodding, Jason slowly walked into the hospital room. Lying in the bed, was Courtney, his Courtney. With her hair matted to the sides of her head, a huge bandage wrapped around her head, and the much-too-big hospital gown falling off her shoulders…she was beautiful.Taking a seat next to her, Jason slowly took her hand in his, holding it to his face. “Courtney,” he whispered, “It’s me. I know you can hear me, so you need to listen. You can’t leave me. I won’t let you. Baby, you need to wake up.” Jason quietly laughed to himself, “You really need to stop getting into car accidents.” With fresh tears in his eyes, he continued, “Remember when you and I got into that bad accident? You asked me to never scare you like that again, because you had almost lost me. You have to do the same for me. Don’t scare me like this. I’m not about to lose you either. Wake up, Courtney. I need you.”

Sonny and Carly arrived 20 minutes later. From the doorway, they saw Jason, holding Courtney’s hand, speaking to her. So lost in Courtney, Jason didn’t even hear the two of them come in. He continued to talk to her, “They took your ring off…don’t worry. I’ll get it back for you. We have so much to do, so much to plan. You need to get through this baby, for us. You’re strong, I know you are. It’s one of the reasons I fell in love with you - show me that strength Courtney. Come back to me, I need you to.”

Carly walked over to Jason and said, “Jase, maybe we should give her some time. She’ll wake up soon enough. Why don’t you come with us to get a cup of coffee and then we’ll come ba--,”

Jason startled Carly as he fiercely interrupted her and said, “No.” He grabbed onto Courtney’s hand tighter as he went on, “No. I am not leaving her. I am staying with her, right here, until she wakes up. She needs me…and I need her. You guys can go…Tony said he doesn’t want too many people in here. But I’m staying. There’s no way I’ll leave her.”

Sensing Jason’s determination, Sonny knew better than to argue. “Come on Carly.” He placed a hand onto Jason’s shoulder, Sonny quietly said, “Jason, we’ll be in the waiting area, to see if we can get anything out of the doctors. Don’t worry - she’ll pull through this. She’s tough. You let me know if you need anything.” Nodding gratefully, Jason looked up at Sonny, silently thanking him. Carly and Sonny quietly walked out of the hospital room, leaving Jason with Courtney.

It had been hours. Jason had not once left Courtney’s side. He had held onto her hand, and throughout the night, had continued to talk to her. Playing with her fingers, stroking her hair, Jason had not once left Courtney. He had prayed all night that she would wake up, and as of yet, her condition had remained the same. Jason’s mind drifted to the morning after he had proposed to her…

Waking slowly, Jason looked over to see Courtney soundly sleeping in his arms. He smiled as he watched her sleep, snoring lightly, as she always did. She looked so peaceful, so beautiful. He silently thanked god for blessing him with Courtney. He leaned over, and kissed Courtney on the forehead, causing her to stir slightly in her sleep, and slowly open her eyes and smile at him.“I’m sorry,” Jason apologized, “I didn’t mean to wake you.”

“No don’t be,” Courtney smiled, “I’d rather be awake when I’m with you anyway. Why waste time sleeping?” She placed her hand at the nape of his neck, running her fingers through the hair on the back of his head, she leaned into Jason, settling back into him, as she put out her left hand and admired her ring.Noticing her admiring her ring, Jason laced his fingers through hers, kissed her on the top of her forehead, and smiled. “It looks perfect on you, Mrs. Morgan.”

Courtney smiled, “Hmm…Mrs. Morgan. I like it.”

Jason turned over, placing himself on top of Courtney and kissed her softly on the lips before responding, “So do I.”

As Jason moved down and began to place small kisses on Courtney’s neck, Courtney went on, “I still can’t believe it. Are we sure we’re ready for something like marriage?”

Jason moved back up, placing his hand on her face as he responded, “Courtney, I love you. I’m sure of it. I can’t see my future without you, and I want you to be my wife. If you don’t think you’re rea--,” He was interrupted as Courtney placed a kiss on his lips.

“No, don’t say that.” She smiled shyly and tucked a piece of hair behind her ear, “I’m sure that I love you. I know I want to be with you for the rest of my life. I have no hesitations when it comes to you and me. It’s the one thing in my life I’m sure of.”Jason said nothing, and responded by kissing her passionately. The nearness of her was intoxicating, and he would always feel himself becoming lost in her, every time he kissed her, every time she came close to him. Everything he felt for her was in that kiss, and Courtney quickly responded. Holding each other tightly, they spent the rest of the morning in bed, making love to one another.

Tears came to Jason’s eyes as he remembered that morning and now looked

at his angel…seeing her this way and not being able to do anything about it was killing him. “Courtney, baby, I need you in my life. Don’t you dare try to leave me. Not now. We have our whole lives ahead of us. We’re supposed to be planning our wedding. You’re supposed to become my wife. How am I going get through the rest of my life without you? I’ve said this to you before, and I’ll say it again - you are the best thing that has ever happened to me. I am not going to lose you. But baby I need your help. I need you to wake up. You said the one thing you’re sure of in your life is your love for me. The same goes for me - with all the craziness and danger my life has, you’re what keeps me stable. You’re my sanity, my best friend, and my love. I need you.”Jason lay his head on the side of the bed, never letting go of Courtney’s hand. Suddenly, he felt slight pressure as Courtney squeezed his hand lightly. He lifted his head and looked at Courtney with hope in his eyes, “That’s it Courtney. Come back to me. I know you can do it.”

Courtney stirred slightly and whispered, “Jason…” He leaned up and kissed her softly on the lips, thrilled that she had finally woken up. His prayers had been answered. She had come back to him.

Hours later, Courtney was sitting up in bed, as Jason fed her soup. She refused to eat any of the hospital food, so Jason had sent Marco to Kelly’s to get some hot soup, and was now feeding it to her. Carly and Sonny had just left, also thrilled that Courtney had finally woken up. “You had us scared there for a minute Court,” Sonny had said, “But I know you’d pull through.”

As she swallowed the last bit of soup, Jason put the bowl down, and got into bed next to Courtney, holding her tightly as she leaned back against him. He reached into his pocket, and pulled out her engagement ring. Lifting her hand, he slid it back onto her finger, kissed her hand and whispered, “Right back where it belongs.”

Courtney smiled at him, and with her hand on his face, she looked down and said, “Jason I’m sorry I put you through all this. If I had been more careful, and watched where I was go--,”

With two fingers on her lips, Jason stopped her. “Stop it. It’s okay. I’m just glad you’re okay. I thought I had lost you.”Smiling, Courtney settled back into Jason, content as he wrapped his arms around her. “Courtney?” Jason asked, “I have a question.”

“Hmm?” Courtney replied, “What’s on your mind?”

Jason entwined her fingers with his and slowly began, “What do you think of moving the wedding up a little sooner than we had planned?”

Courtney sat up and turned to look at him. “How much sooner?” she asked.

Jason smiled and looked down as he said, “Um...well...maybe tomorrow?”

With wide eyes, Courtney looked at him, “Jason are you crazy?! We can’t plan a wedding by tomorrow!!”

“Yes we can!” Jason said. “You’re being released today. We’ll fly down to the island tonight.. It’ll be me, you, Sonny, Michael, Carly, and Mike. A small ceremony, with just the people we love and care about.” Jason looked at her, with a gleam in his eyes.

Courtney laughed, “Baby, I love you too - but why the rush? What’s on?”

Jason looked at her, holding her face in his hands and responded, “I just…I just want to start my life with you. I love you so much, and I just…I can’t wait for you to become Mrs. Morgan. Selfish I know, but I want you to officially be mine.”

Kissing him softly, Courtney replied, “I don’t need a certificate to make me officially yours…I’m yours already…but you know, you’re right. I love you too, and there really is no need to wait anymore. Let’s do it.”

Grinning, Jason kissed Courtney passionately, as they both anticipated the wedding, and their future together.

A Sorta Fairytale - Part IV: And I Wait

Jason sighed as he looked out of the balcony, onto the street below. It had been one month. Only four weeks. But the past thirty days had felt like an eternity to him. How had things happened like this? He had been so happy…things had finally been going right. And just as soon as happiness had found him, fate had snatched it away…

“I need you to give him a warning - his last one. I’m tired of these games. You let him know, that he’s disrespected me once - he does it again, and I’ll strike back.” Jason nodded as he listened to Sonny’s instructions. Sammy Tagliotti was getting arrogant again, throwing around empty threats. Knowing what he had to do, he walked out of Sonny’s penthouse, hoping he could get it done before going home to Courtney later that night.

“Jason Morgan…I’ve been waiting for you.” Tagliotti’s confident smirked angered Jason. “Leave us alone,” he said to his two guards, who obeyed, leaving the old warehouse where Tagliotti had agreed to meet Jason.

Keeping his face cold, Jason slowly, deliberately walked over to him. With his face an inch away from Tagliotti, Jason slowly said, “You’re been making threats. Sonny isn’t happy. This is a warning. Keep pushing, and Sonny will strike back.”

Tagliotti laughed and shook his head as he said, “So what now? I bow down to the all-mighty Sonny Corinthos? I don’t think so, Morgan. See, you’re his little lap dog, so maybe it’s difficult for you to understand. I’ll break it down for you. I want part of Sonny’s territory. I’m tired of seeing him get everything he wants, leaving the rest of us out. I’m not afraid of him - you tell him to strike back. You also let him know that if he does, I’m not the one who will lose. Not this time.” Stepping away, Tagliotti turned around, prepared to walk out of the warehouse. Turning back to face Jason, he started speaking again. “You know, come to think of it, I have a better way of getting my message across to Sonny. Maybe…just maybe, sending him your corpse would do the trick…”

Without warning, Tagliotti pulled out his gun. Jason’s response was quick - two shots rang in the air as Jason ducked down. Hearing nothing, Jason slowly stood up and saw Tagliotti sprawled on the ground, blood all over. With his gloves still on, Jason gently checked for a pulse - nothing. He had killed him.

Walking out of the warehouse, Jason went straight to Sonny’s penthouse.

The night had grown cold. Jason moved from the balcony and into his room. Settling into the couch, he thought back to how Sonny had reacted. He wasn’t angry - if anything he was relieved. Getting rid of Tagliotti meant one less threat. It seemed as if all would be well. And then Scott Baldwin knocked on the door…

“Well, well, well, why am I not surprised that our local mobster and his little Anger Boy are having a ‘hush hush’ meeting? What could you two possibly be discussing…maybe the murder of fellow mobster Sammy Tagliotti?”

Glaring at him, Sonny said, “Look Baldwin, I don’t know what you’re talking about. Do you have any reason for being here?”

Smirking, Baldwin replied, “Well, you see. Right now, at this very moment, my guys are bringing in two of Tagliotti’s guards down for questioning. Apparently, someone saw them leave the warehouse…which means they know who,” Scott looked directly at Jason, “was with him in that warehouse - i.e. who killed him. Now I’m willing to bet that the person with him was our very own Anger Boy! And I thought I’d save us all a little time, come down here, and take you down to the station now, for questioning as well.”

Sonny chuckled as he said, “You’re a real piece of work. You barge into my penthouse, spewing accusations, with no arrest warrant, and you think you can just drag Jason down to the station? You have three seconds to get out before I throw you out.”

About to reply, Scott was interrupted by the ringing of his phone. “Baldwin,” he scruffily answered. “All right, I’m coming.” He hung up and shook his head, “You’re lucky they need me down at my office - but don’t you worry. As soon as I talk to those guards, you can be sure I’ll be back. Count on it.” Walking out of the penthouse, he slammed the door behind him.

As soon as he left, Sonny turned to Jason. “Did those guards see you?” he asked. Jason slowly nodded, not knowing what else to say. Sonny put his head in his hands, and then looked back up. “You know what this means, don’t you?”

Nodding, Jason softly replied, “Yeah…I need to leave the country.”

Walking over to the kitchen, Jason took a beer out of the refrigerator. Leaning against a nearby table, he drank his beer, thinking about her the entire time. Courtney. At the time, leaving the country was his only option. He would have to wait until Sonny cleared things out and put all of this to rest. He had wanted nothing more than to take Courtney with him…she was the light in his life. The one thing that he knew he couldn’t live without. But he knew it wouldn’t work. There wasn’t enough time. Given a few days, he could have prepared. Fake ID, alias, etc. But there wasn’t enough time. He had no choice but to leave her…

“Hey!” Courtney smiled at the sight of Jason. Her smile quickly faded seeing the look on his face. “What’s wrong?” she softly asked. “What happened?”

Jason held her hand, and walked her over to the couch. Entwining her fingers in his, Jason took a deep breath and softly said, “I have to leave for a while.”

Immediately understanding what he was saying, Courtney was silent. With wide eyes, Courtney softly whispered, “Then I’m leaving with you.” Tears came to her eyes as she continued, “Jason, I don’t have to know why you have to leave. I don’t have to know for how long. All I know is that if you’re leaving, I’m not letting you leave without me.”

His heart ached, seeing the tears in her eyes. Holding his own tears back, he shook his head. “I have to…” he said, his voice barely above a whisper “…I have to go on my own.”

Shaking her head, Courtney stood up, her emotions taking over, “Dammit Jason, no!” Tears spilled from her eyes. “How am I supposed to let you walk out of that door without me? I love you, and you love me. Whatever it is, we’ll get through it together…I can’t live my life without you…you know that.” She absently wiped her tears away, pleading him with her eyes. Her voice dropped down to a whisper again, “Please, Jason. Let me go with you.”

Jason stood up. Walking over to her, he held her face. Tears fell from his eyes as he held her close. He softly said, “I want nothing more than to take you with me. You know you’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me. I love you. But I can’t. There’s not enough time to make arrangements.” The ache in his heart grew stronger as he saw more tears fall from Courtney’s eyes. “Baby, listen to me. As soon as I can, I will send for you. But for right now, I have to go. I love you. And I’m not going to lose you.”

Slowly nodding, Courtney whispered, “I love you too.” Moving her hands to the back of his beck, she continued, “Promise me you’ll come back to me.”

Kissing her forehead, Jason whispered, “I promise.” His body was shaking at the thought of leaving her. Steadying himself, he softly kissed her eyes, both her cheeks, and her lips. She started crying again as he held her tightly, her head buried in the crook of his neck. He closed his eyes, held her, and softly cried to himself. After a few minutes, he pulled away, and, he held her face again, leaning down to kiss her. The kiss was passionate, and filled with emotion. He memorized the feel of her warm lips on his, and the rhythm of their tongues that only they knew how to dance to. Ending the kiss, Jason leaned his forehead on Courtney’s. He whispered, “I love you.” Walking to the door, he looked back one more time with tears in his eyes before walking out, shutting the door behind him.

Tears came to Jason’s eyes just remembering that night. The past month had been horrible for him. He longed for her every moment of every day. To hold her in his arms, hear her sweet laugh…not a day went by that his heart didn’t ache for her. He spent his days in his rented room, never leaving. He had wanted to send for her, but as soon as Scott Baldwin had found out Jason had left town, he had put 24-hour surveillance on Courtney. She had no choice but to stay in Port Charles and wait.

The waiting was the worst. His mind drifted often. He would think back to all the times he had held her, made love to her. He would think back to all the happy times she had given him. And as wonderful as those thoughts were, a part of him ached every time he remembered her, making him miss her even more. She had made his life complete, and now he was supposed to be apart from her, and find some way to live with it. Even if it was temporary.

His thoughts were interrupted when he heard a knock on the door. From the other side, he heard Marco say, “Sir? It’s Marco.”

Jason opened the door and nodded in greeting to Marco. Handing him a letter, Marco smiled. “It’s from Courtney.” He walked out, letting Jason shut the door behind him.

Going back to the couch, Jason sat down and carefully opened the letter…

I don’t even know if I can clearly express how much I miss you. I’ve been working extra shifts at Kelly’s and even started taking some classes at PCU to keep myself busy. This is how I handle not having you with me. It works sometimes, but more often than not, my mind drifts to you. I know it’s only temporary, and that’s what keeps me going. Knowing that one day, I’ll be in your arms again. One day we’ll be together again - I know it. Stay strong, just like I know you will. And don’t worry about me. Yes, I miss you more than words can describe, but I’m okay. I have hope…and that’s what getting me through this. The hope that one day, you are going to walk right back through that door, back into my life - where you belong. Hold onto that same hope, Jason…that’s what will bring you back to me. I’m sure of it.

Sighing, he shook his head and smiled to himself. Leave it to Courtney to stay strong throughout this whole mess. But she was right, as usual. He got out a piece of paper and a pen, and began to write back to her.

Courtney walked into the penthouse, sighing. Sonny had insisted she move into Jason’s penthouse for protection, and she had agreed - staying at the loft without Jason would have been too difficult anyway. She tossed her coat on the chair nearby and sat on the couch, leaning her head back. It had been one month. One long month without her Jason. Closing her eyes, she willed herself to rest, and not worry about him. She was interrupted by a knock on the door. Opening it, she saw Johnny, holding a letter.

Handing it to her, he said, “Mrs. Morgan, this just came in. It’s from Jason”

With tears in her eyes, Courtney smiled as Johnny left. Sitting down, she opened the letter and began reading.

I don’t even know where to begin…I miss you. This past month has been so hard for me, and reading your letter has been the bright spot in this long, dark month. I can’t sleep without you in my arms, I can’t stop thinking about you. It’s killing me not being able to be with you. But you were right. Hope is what we both have to hold onto, and baby believe me, I am. I cannot wait for the day when I can hold you again…see your beautiful smile…and make love to you again. You are what is getting me through this - every time I feel upset, I close my eyes, think of you, and you bring me at peace. I know that we’ll be back together again, and I sit here every moment of the day, waiting for that day. I love you more than words can describe, and trust me - I will come back to you. I promised you I wasn’t going to lose you, and I won’t. I’m waiting for the day that I walk through the door and back to you in your arms - right where I belong.