Title: Misunderstandings
Author: Kay
Feedback: BSBLUV4VER47@aol.com
Rating: PG-13 - NC-17
Category: WIP
Type: Romance/Angst
Summary: In the hospital after being in a terrible car accident, Courtney discovers that she is pregnant. Before she gets a chance to tell Jason, he breaks up with her. Heartbroken, Courtney turns to her older brother, Sonny, who does his best to keep his number one and his little sister apart. Will Jason and Courtney be able to overcome their misunderstandings and raise their child together?

Disclaimer: I borrowed heavily from the transcripts from 2/6, 2/10, and 2/11 in the first chapter, but I do not plan on profiting from my usage of Jason, Courtney, Sonny, etc. I do not own those characters; I just have fun running amok in their lives!

The ride in the ambulance had been long and nerve-wracking. They let her stay with Jason, and she held his hand the whole time, whispering to him, telling him he had to be all right, that she wasn't going to let him leave her.

When they made it to the hospital, everything started to speed up. They were rushing him into the operating room, and she was running right along with him, but outside of the room Monica pushed her away.

"You need to be examined as well," she heard Dr. Jones tell her.

"No. I want to stay with Jason!"

"Courtney, you'll only be in the way, and you need to be examined as well."

Courtney shook her head, so Monica tried to persuade her. "Courtney, please just go with Dr. Jones. You know I won't let anything happen to Jason. Not if I can help it. Now please go with him."

Courtney let out a frustrated sigh. "All right! Fine! I'll go, but please, I need to see Jason when he gets out of surgery...to make sure that he's all right."

"Of, course," Monica agreed.

Courtney allowed Dr. Jones to walk her to an examining room. "Dr. Jones there's nothing wrong with me, seriously. So can you please make this quick so that I can get back to Jason as soon as possible?"

"Well, it certainly seems like you're all right. Let me just take a look at that cut on your head--are you all right?" he questioned when he saw the look on Courtney's face. Her face had completely drained of color.

Courtney suddenly felt dizzy. She put out a hand and Dr. Jones took it to try to steady her. He led her to a chair in the examination room. "You sit right there."

Courtney sat down and closed her eyes, trying to swallow back the lump in her throat. "I felt fine, just a minute ago...well, I felt a little sick in the ambulance...I just thought it was motion sickness."

"Do you feel that way often?"

"Not usually, just recently."

"Have you been feeling nauseated often?"

"No," she replied quickly. But then she thought about it a little longer. Actually she had felt sick before. "The first time I felt this way was at Jason's trial, when I fainted and made a fool of myself," she let out a sarcastic laugh. "And well, since then I've felt a little sick sometimes when I wake up in the morning."

"Have you had your period in the last six weeks?"

His question took Courtney completely by surprise. "You're not asking me what I think you're asking me, are you?" Courtney shook her head. "No. It's impossible..." But she tried to count back the weeks to when she last had her period. "Oh, God, I can't be pregnant!" she gasped.

"There's only one way we can be sure," Dr. Jones told her. "Let me get some blood and I'll test you."

Courtney nodded. Dr. Jones left the room and left Courtney alone with her thoughts. A baby? Could it be possible? She supposed it was even though they had only made love once, and used a condom. But she knew that even using a condom wasn't a 100% effective every time. And it certainly seemed as if she and Jason had "beaten" the odds. Even though she didn't have any proof, she knew she was pregnant with Jason's child.

All the signs had been there, the dizziness, her missed period...she just hadn't wanted to think about what it indicated and what it could mean to her relationship with Jason.

Their relationship had been secret for so long, and they were just going to share it with the whole world. What would Jason think? Or Sonny? Or, God, Elizabeth and AJ? She didn't even want to think about AJ and Elizabeth's reactions. Of course, the only one whose reaction meant anything was in surgery right at that moment, and she couldn't help her fear that maybe he wouldn't make it out...

Dr. Jones interrupted her thoughts when he returned. "Okay, let's get this over with." He took some of her blood, then told her that he wanted her to stay overnight for observation. "And I'm going to get these test results expedited since you were in a car accident. I think it's important that we know everything as soon as possible."

"That's fine," Courtney agreed. "Can you tell me anything about Jason? Has he made it out of surgery yet?"

"No, but Dr. Quartermaine tells me that the surgery is going well. He should be out soon."

Courtney gave a sigh of relief. "That's good to hear. Could you please tell me as soon as he gets out? I'd like to see him as soon as possible."

"I will, but first I want to get you settled in. You could use some rest."

Knowing that Jason was going to be all right did make her realize just how tired she was. Yesterday had been very long, and she was tired and hungry. Her stomach growled to let both her and Dr. Jones know that she was hungry.

Dr. Jones grinned at her, and patted her on the shoulder. "Once you get into your room, I'll have a nurse bring you some food."

Courtney smiled back. "That sounds good."

~*~

The tests results confirmed what she already knew in her heart. Now she just had to figure out a way to tell Jason, except he still wasn't out of surgery when Dr. Jones came to tell her the results. He was still doing well, and she felt more confident about his recovery with every moment that passed. But as the end of his surgery neared she felt more and more nervous about her news and what his reaction would be. She knew he would take care of her and the baby out of obligation, and she knew that he loved her, but they had never even talked about having children of their own. They only talked about when he was Michael's father, and that is how she knew he would love their baby.

With thoughts of seeing Jason soon and making sure that he was going to make a complete recovery, Courtney found herself dozing off. Being in a nice warm bed and having some hot food in her belly was soporific. "Jason," she whispered before she let her sleepiness overtake her.

Sonny walked in and watched his sister sleep. She looked so peaceful and at ease in the bed, almost like Michael did when he slept. And he wanted to make sure that she stayed that way, and that she stayed protected. That's why he wanted her away from Jason and as far away from Port Charles as possible.

After he left her room he went to talk to Dr. Jones. "Is my sister all right?" he questioned.

"Yes, she is fine. There don't appear to be any lingering effects from her exposure to the cold. She'll be fine."

"That's good."

"Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to check up on Jason."

"I'd like to check up on him as well," Sonny said.

"Okay, then, just follow me," Dr. Jones replied. "I just need to drop off this prescription for your sister first."

"What prescription?"

"I'm not at liberty to say."

Sonny nodded, but he knew that there was something that Dr. Jones was hiding from him. He followed as Dr. Jones took the prescription to the pharmacy. After he dropped it off Sonny made sure to see what it was for, so he casually stepped forward as Dr. Jones handed the prescription to the pharmacist. He was shocked when he saw that it was for pre-natal vitamins.

Courtney was pregnant!

~*~

Sonny waited for Jason to wake up with all the more reason to keep Jason away from Courtney now that he'd discovered that she was pregnant. He couldn't let her die like Lily had, and he couldn't let Jason live with the guilt and pain from having to survive his lover and his unborn child. Ever since he found out that Courtney was pregnant he kept seeing visions of Lily exploding, and he couldn't bear the thought of that happening to Courtney.

He watched as Jason's eyes fluttered open. Then he saw him remove the tubes from his mouth.

"Courtney."

It was the first word out of Jason's mouth, and because it was his sister's name it startled Sonny at how much she had come to mean to Jason.

"Courtney's fine. We were worried about you."

"There's something you need to know."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah, me and Courtney were--we were on our way to tell you how things are. We're together now--"

Sonny interrupted him while he tried to explain. It didn't matter now that Jason was in love with Courtney because all that mattered was that he end his relationship with her and end it now before anyone got hurt.

The words hurt Jason, hearing from his best friend that he should leave the woman he loved, but he tried to convince himself that Sonny was only saying it because he didn't really understand how much he loved Courtney and that he would do anything to honor and protect her.

"I should have told you when I--when I started to feel for Courtney."

"When was that?"

"It was some time after the stalking. You know, I was guarding her and I liked her. Then I realized it was more. I should've told you."

"Yeah, you should've told me." But Sonny should have seen the signs that were there right in front of his face. He had known that Jason was hiding something from him, and he had even had Carly hinting to him the fact that Courtney and Jason were more than just friends, but he still hadn't wanted to believe it.

"It's not like you to keep secrets."

"Yeah, I know, Sonny. I was just waiting for the right time. You know, things kept happening. Brenda and I were supposed to get that annulment, and then Alcazar was killed and we had to stay together for the trial. And then Courtney and I just thought it'd be better to keep it quiet, and she didn't want anyone to know. She didn't want to fight with AJ anymore than she had to, or Mike, or you, I guess..." Jason shook his head a little bit take aback by Sonny's reaction. "I really didn't know this would be a problem for you."

Sonny continued to delve into the depths of their relationship. Some things were obvious because she was pregnant, but he still wanted to know.

"You rented a place for her?"

"Yeah, so--so we could meet and no one would know." Jason shifted his position slightly to try to make himself more comfortable and grunted with the pain.

"You want me to call a doctor?"

"No, no, no." Jason could tell that Sonny was really upset over this. Upset that he had lied to him and kept things from him. And he seemed disappointed as well. Jason couldn't stand the thought of Sonny being upset with him. "God, I'm sorry I didn't tell you right away. I didn't mean it as betrayal."

"I know you'd never betray me, Jason, and I'm not doing this to punish you. I just wish you would have told me from the beginning. That way I could have explained to you why you can't be with Courtney...before you fell in love with her. That's what happened, right? You--you love her?"

"Yes, I do." Jason felt an enormous amount of relief to finally be able to say that. He felt a small amount of pride, too, because he had fallen in love with a beautiful, radiant woman and she loved him back.

"Well, I'm sorry."

"Sonny, I'm not," Jason replied confidently.

"You're my enforcer. You take lives and you risk your own. There's nothing you can give Courtney, nothing that will last. You know this has to end."

Jason tried to deny it. "I love Courtney. And she loves me, and I don't want that to end."

"Courtney said she loved you?"

"Yeah."

"She know--she know what you do?"

"I guarded her for months."

"Well, you're not a guard, Jason. Does she understand your real work?"

"I told her that I do jobs for you that I can't talk about. And she's hear AJ and the cops call me an hit man, and she knows what that means." Yet even though she knew all those things there were parts of himself that he still tried to hide from her. He suspected that she knew that there was a lot more that he wasn't telling her, but she just didn't care. And she probably should care. "I don't think Courtney really understands."

"She couldn't. Courtney has seen you be gentle and kind. She's probably seen you angry. It's not pretty, but she can accept it. A guy with a temper who gives into it occasionally, who has no problem fighting for what matters. She will--Courtney probably will think that a noble thin. She's not wrong. But she has not seen your real work, and you have not told her, have you, Jason? How, on my orders, you take a gun, you go to my enemies, you pull the trigger, and you end their lives? You don't hate these people. You don't even care about them one way or the other. They're targets, obstacles I want removed. Isn't that right?"

Jason swallowed hard. "Yes."

"Does my sister understand that?"

He shook his head. "No."

"Okay, that means she doesn't love you, she loves the man you would've been if you never met me. She loves the part of you that's still clean inside. But if she knew who you really are and what you really do, at best she would be afraid. At worst you would disgust her. Unless you think Courtney's the type of girl who would be comfortable with a killer."

Again, Jason could only shake his head. "No."

"Okay, you can go ahead and say it. I made this life for you. You were as innocent as Michael. I made you my enforcer. I use you to keep me in power. Now that is the reason why you can't be with my sister."

'"I chose what I wanted."

"You're going to have to pay the price. Set Courtney free."

"I won't tell Courtney not to love me."

"Well, she doesn't have to stop loving you; she's just got to love you from a distance. You just got to make it clear that you're not going to see her. She'll hurt, but she'll get over it."

"Why does it have to be this way? You have Carly and Michael..." Jason felt another lump lodge in his throat as he thought about how once they were his family. "And I--well--you protect them. I can do that for Courtney."

"Is that what you want for my sister, Jason? The danger, the guards? You want to do things you know that she can't know about? Being told what to do when she hates it? You see what it does to Carly. Carly sits on the fear until she can't take it anymore, and then she blows up and she does something crazy."

"Courtney's not like that."

"Yeah, she's not," he agreed. "Not now, she's not, because Courtney is soft. She's gentle. Even with the hell she's been through, she sees the good in people. She hopes everything is going to work out for the best. She still believes that the right person wins instead of the strongest. Carly's got steel in her. She doesn't care about anybody but herself--only the people she loves. Everybody else can go to hell. Don't you want more for Courtney?"

"I love her. I love Courtney enough to let her make her own decision. If you want me to tell her the truth--"

"No, no. You know what, I don't want you to burden Courtney with that knowledge. And eve if you did, even if you told her, even if she saw you kill somebody with her own eyes and still wanted to be with you, I would not give my blessing! And not just for Courtney, but for you. You cannot protect her, Jason. There's no--" Sonny stopped himself to calm down as visions of Lily flashed through his head. "There's no worse hell than watching the woman you love die because of you.

"You're right about Carly and Michael. I keep them with me in spite of the danger. I keep telling myself they're safe, but I know I'm lying. You won't have to lie about Courtney, Jason."

"You want me to save Courtney by hurting her. I don't--" Jason sighed deeply and sorrowfully, "I don't understand."

"Well, can you understand that it hurts worst to die? Huh? Lily could tell you if you could hear her, if she wasn't cold in the ground with the angels in heaven or wherever else I sent her when she walked across that parking lot with my child so she can--explode in a car bomb that was meant for me. It's never gone. It fades sometimes for day, weeks. Until Michael's playing around, you know, when something falls and the sound is so loud you--you think it's a gunshot. Or I'm laying next to Carly late at night and I see Lily's face, and there's a bright light and the sound of the car blowing apart, the sound of her life ending. If Courtney dies because of you, you'll be carrying it forever. Don't take that chance. Walk away."

He knew that he had convinced Jason that he was right because of how quiet he had gotten. Knowing that he had made his point, even if he had to be somewhat cruel about it made him feel better. He knew that some day Jason would probably thank him for keeping him from such heartbreak.

When Monica came in to kick him out of Jason's room, he left, confident that Jason would do what was best for both himself, and Courtney.

~*~

When Courtney woke up she was frustrated to find that the doctors wouldn't let her go see Jason. She knew she had slept for a long time, and that his surgery must have been over long ago. She wondered if he had already woken up and was as worried about her as she was about him. She was pleasantly surprised when she saw him walk into her hospital room. She immediately climbed out of bed and rushed over to meet him as he shuffled in.

"Hey, what are you doing here?" she asked with a bright smile at the sight of him.

He walked close to her and she immediately wrapped her arms around him to pull him into her inviting embrace. He sighed into her hair, and then pulled away, but kept his hand on her shoulder.

"I just--I had to see you."

"Yeah, well, I was dying to see you, too, but I was just going to come to your room. I was so afraid you weren't going to make it. Don't ever scare me like that again." She tried to make her voice sound angry at him, but she was just so happy that he was alive.

Jason smiled back at her. "I won't."

Then Courtney's concern for him overtook her. "Look, I think it's great that you're able to walk around, but maybe you should be resting."

"No, you know what? I don't like hospitals. I'm going to check myself out."

"Ok, well, then we'll leave together, ok?" She pulled back to move towards the closet. "Just give me a minute to get dressed. We'll go back to the loft and...I...I have something to tell you--" For some reason she was glad that she wouldn't have to tell him about the baby in the hospital. The loft had become a special place to her, and she wanted more than anything than to tell him the news in that place.

Jason reached out to stop her with his hand. "Courtney. You need to listen to me."

"Okay, well, we'll talk on the way to the loft. You need to lie down and rest."

Jason shook his head. "I can't see you anymore."

"What?" Courtney asked in complete shock. In all the scenarios that had gone through her head for when she told him about the baby, this one she had tried to push back into a dark corner of her thoughts. Somehow Jason knew about the baby, and he didn't want to be with her anymore.

"I won't be going back to the loft or spending time with you. It's just best that we don't--we don't see each other at all."

She felt tears forming in her eyes, and she couldn't keep them from spilling onto her cheeks. "Was it something that I did that makes you just want us to be over?"

"I should have never let it get as far as it did. You're not safe with me."

Courtney tried to close her eyes from the pain, but when she opened them Jason was still there, with that hurt expression on his face and she knew that it was over. "Don't pretend that's what you want."

"You need to understand that I'm--that I'm done."

"No," Courtney cried out. "You put your trust in me. You let me get close to you."

"Stop. Just stop pushing--"

"Why? Do you want me to just pretend that it meant nothing, that it never happened? That you never helped me? We never spent Christmas together? We never met in secret at our loft and listened to each other and planned all the things we--you just want me to pretend that it meant nothing, Jason?"

"I need you to understand that I can't protect you and it's just best if we were apart--"

"No, I understand. I understand what you do, and I accept it. I want to be a part of your life. How can you just throw that away?"

"It doesn't matter."

Courtney shook her head, trying to keep the pain at bay. She felt him pulling away from her. She felt that it had to be because of the baby. He didn't care so much about the danger before she was pregnant, but now that she was his feelings completely changed.

"I've got to go."

She wondered how he knew about the baby, though. "Just first be honest with me. Did Sonny tell you--"

Jason interrupted her. "Sonny told me what I already knew--"

...Sonny told me what I already knew... The words cut through her like a knife. She closed her eyes with the added betrayal that he didn't want her and he didn't want their baby either. He already knew, but he hadn't told her that he even suspected.

She heard him whisper goodbye and then leave. All she could do was go back to her bed and cry.

He knew the whole time! He probably didn't want to tell her so that she could find out on her own and end it before he had to ask. Well, she wouldn't do it. She was going to keep the baby, with or without his help. Or his love. God! It hurt to think that he didn't love her anymore because of a baby. And it hurt even worse because even though he didn't love her, she still loved him.