Chapter Twenty-seven: Where We Stand Together

She sat on the hospital bed and he sat across from her in a chair as he told her the whole story from start to finish never saying a word and never interrupting. She simply sat there listening to him. Once done he waited and still she stared at him giving away nothing. He couldn’t tell whether she was angry with him or just disappointed maybe a little bit of both. Moments passed between them and he simply waited. He ran his hand over his face and then slowly reached out to touch her knee. Her eyes followed his movement as he laid a gentle hand on her exposed flesh. "Courtney?" His voice was low, just slightly shaking. There was so much at stake in this one moment. Would she turn him away? She could. She had every right to. He had lied to her. Maybe not with so many words but his actions and the way he made the situation out to be. He had misled her the same way he misled Elizabeth and look how that turned out. This couldn’t end the same way. So he waited with bated breath.

She looked up at him when he called her name and watched him. She had never seen so many emotions cross his face as he told her the whole story of how he had come to marry Brenda. She supposed she should cut into him for misleading her. She should tell him just how angry she was at how he had made her believe that she was sneaking around with someone else’s husband. She should do a lot of things but all she could do was shake her head and sigh. Reaching out she covered his hand with her own and he looked down at the way that she caressed his palm. He looked up and saw her smiling. You see she should probably walk away from him but all she could do was feel an extreme amount of relief. It was a tremendous relief to know that they were both free. They were free to be together.

"You’re mine?" She asked softly unable to help herself.

He smiled up into her eyes completely astounded by the way she was able to take in what he said and forgive him. He nodded not trusting his own voice. Leaning over he took her in his arms and held her tight. Burying his face into the crook of her neck he breathed in her scent and lay soft kisses on her skin. He let his hands get tangled in her hair and felt as her fingers came to rest beneath his arms circling up around his shoulders. He pulled back and kissed her earlobe before whispering, "I’m all yours."

Back at Harborview Towers…

Sonny rode up on the elevator his mind playing over all that had happened in the last few days. He had never been so happy to have his life back. As he stepped off onto his floor he stood in the hallway. He knew where he should go. He had only seen Carly briefly since he had been home before rushing off to check on Courtney. He should go home to his wife and yet the pull was still there to see if Brenda was okay. It wasn’t as if his intentions weren’t honorable. He just wanted to make sure that she was all right. The need to be there for her and protect her was always there. It was apart of what made him who he was. Like the compilation of his organs that made up his biological form, protecting her was an intricate part of what made him tick. He sighed looking at the closed door to Jason’s penthouse. Maybe that was the problem. Maybe protecting her wasn’t what she needed. She had her whole life ahead of her and he doubted if that life included him. She wasn’t his… well she wasn’t his anything anymore. He smiled thinking of a life that had long since passed him by. He draped his coat over his arm and began to walk away when he heard the door click and open and there she stood. She looked up and their eyes automatically locked.

"Hey." He said in a soft whisper.

She smiled unable to help herself. "Hey." She threw back. "Are you okay?" She asked.

"Yeah… never better. I just got back from seeing Courtney. She’s doing fine." He nodded still standing in the hallway closer to his own home then to hers but fully facing her.

"That’s good. I’m glad. Could you… Would you help me please?"

"Yeah sure." He quickly responded glad for an excuse to come over. Upon entering he looked around at the boxes. Some of them were open others closed and marked. He looked over his shoulder as she came up behind him and made her way over to the couch. "Packing up?" He asked.

"Yeah. I called Jax and told him the great news and asked him about moving back into my cottage. He said that I could as soon as I could get all my things together." She responded flopping down on the sofa and bringing a box closer to her so that she could tape it up.

He stood there for a moment watching her. "You think that’s a good idea? Alcazar is still out there. He’s coming back to Port Charles and he’s going to come for you."

"I know. But I also know that you’re not going to let anything happen to me. You’re going to have guards on me all the time now probably right?" She asked looking over at him as she cut a piece of tape with her teeth and began to cover the cardboard box in front of her.

He smiled and shrugged. "Yeah that didn’t stop him before."

"Then where I’m at won’t make any difference. If Luis comes for me he’ll come for me and you’ll always be there to bring me home." She remarked softly locking eyes with him.

He looked away first knowing that what she said was true. He sighed as he draped his coat over the back of the couch and took a seat beside her. "So what do you need me to do?"

"Just pick up some clothes and start putting them inside of the boxes. If you could keep sweaters together that would be cool you know? Like right now I’m putting all my jeans together, something like that." She said opening up another box."

He sighed not really paying attention and blindly picking up an article of clothing. After a moment he laughs slightly.

"What?" She asked looking over at him.

"Nothing… it’s just…"

"What? What is it?" She questioned, stopping her folding and looking over at him with smiling eyes.

"This is just a lot more organized then I expected from you."

"Oh why because I’m such a slob?"

"No I didn’t say that… but I have lived with you so…" He let the sentence trail off.

"Meaning?" She asked.

"Nothing you know… just that I know you. I know how you fold… or don’t fold." He remarked with a wide grin.

She rolled her eyes. "Whatever. I was the perfect roommate." She stated defensively smirking.

He cleared his throat looking over at her. "We were a lot of things Brenda… but roommates weren’t one of them." He stated staring into her. There was electricity in the air that neither of them could deny feeling.

This time it was her turn to break the stare. She licked her lips absently and sighed. "Yeah well you forget I lived with you too and I remember coming to see you right after that night in the snow… there were an awful lot of Chinese food cartons decorating your bedroom." She cut her eyes at him.

"Wait. Wait. Wait. That doesn’t count."

"What do you mean that doesn’t count? Of course it counts."

"No it doesn’t. I wasn’t able to move at the time. I couldn’t even get out of bed. How did you expect me to clean? I could barely move." He retorted trying to defend himself.

She sighed. "Excuses! Excuses!"

"That’s not an excuse, that’s the truth sweetheart."

She laughed. "Yeah well just keep folding."

"Fine… but you need to get your facts straight."

"I got my facts straight just fine."

"I don’t know about that." He smiled at her as he reached out to pick up something else of hers and stopped when he turned back to look at it.

She stopped too as she stared at the dress within his hands.

The silk ran through his fingers like water as he stared at the wine red dress within his palms. The feel of it was so familiar even though it had been five years since he had seen it. Five long years and he still knew every contour of that dress. It was embedded in his brain for all eternity. "Last unmarried date." He whispered to himself.

She sighed feeling the tears come to her eyes just at the memory of that one night. That had been the best night of her life. It was suppose to be the first night of the rest of their lives together, her life with him. "God it seems like a lifetime ago."

"I didn’t know… I didn’t think that you kept this." He couldn’t take his eyes away from it, almost as mesmerized by it as he was by her.

She nodded. "Yeah well, after the accident Jax took all my clothes and packed them up and left them in the cottage. When I came back he gave me the key so that I could go through some of my things and pick out what I wanted while I was still hiding out away from Luis. I found it and I just… I couldn’t leave it behind. I figured that if I was going to have to leave again I wanted to take some things from my past with me." She explained looking over at him trying to see what he was thinking.

He laid it out on the coffee table before him and let his hands rest beneath his chin as if staring at a masterpiece. "I remember everything about that night. I mean I still have dreams about it sometimes." She whispered.

"Me too." Was all he said as he looked over at her and saw that she was staring at him just as intensely as he was staring at her.

He watched her as she stood up and reached out her hand for him. "Give me your hand." She said and waited.

He sat there looking up at her. Without thinking he took her hand and she pulled him up so that they were both standing. She led him around the couch so they were standing in the center of the room. "Dance with me." She requested.

"There’s no music." He stated.

She shook her head. "When have we ever needed music? All we need is each other right now the rest will come." She said and he took her for her word. He brought her into his embrace and held her against him. Closing his eyes he felt as her arms encircled his neck as his went around her waist. She rested her cheek against his solid form taking in a deep breath as she closed her eyes. "Do you hear it? They’re playing our song." She whispered into his chest.

He nodded feeling her weight press against him. He could almost hear it. If he held her tighter and listened with his heart he could hear the music.

Her heartbeat being the soft drums and her soft breathing becoming the gentle sound of a light percussion instrument. Her feet had become the piano and he swore that as long they kept together the music would never stop.

She didn’t know when she had decided that being without him wasn’t an option. She couldn’t remember when she had made her choice to keep on loving him maybe because she had never stopped. She knew that he wasn’t free to love her or be with her. He was married and she knew that. And yet it couldn’t stop the pull of them being together. Yeah it would hurt in the beginning and someone’s heart was bound to get broken, maybe even her own. It wouldn’t be the first time that he had. Their love had been filled with a lot of hurtful words and broken hearts but it always came back to this. Him holding her… her falling into him. It was the blessing and the curse of a love this strong.

But that wasn’t the issue right now. Being with him again like this was worth the heartache. To be able to hold him one more time. To be able to love him for just one more moment would be worth any pain that she had to pay. She needed this. She needed him. She had been telling him the truth all those years ago when she told him that she would love him forever. When she said that no matter where they were she would always be in his arms.

He knew where his heart lye. It was right here in this very moment. It wasn’t about being strong or doing the right thing. It was about feeling and what your heart needed. And as much as it scared him to know, his heart needed her. She was his breath. She made his heart beat and his pulse race. He may have never known what love was until her and that was hard to walk away from. It was impossible and he knew it. As long as she still breathed he would always be there. He would always be falling in love with her again and again.

And so they stayed lock in each other’s arms. The rain hitting against the window and the wind rustling the last of the November leaves still hanging on but they couldn’t hear it. All they could hear was the pounding of their hearts sounding of a rhythm that only they could identify. The music that was created by their own breathing and their own love wrapped them together and held them closer then they could ever imagine.

"I love you." She whispered and placed a single finger over his lips to stop him from speaking not needing him to. Looking up into his eyes she stared into their smoldering depths losing herself. She could see it. All that he couldn’t say, all that he held back she could see it. Just as clearly as that day they laid eyes on one another when she stepped out of Saint Timothy’s church and they met again… She could see that he still loved her.

That he would always love her.

And God help her if he ever stopped.

Chapter Twenty-eight: A New Beginning

His head was spinning with the closeness of her. His hands were in her hair and his mouth was moving across hers in a silent romantic dance that was all their own. Finally when he couldn’t hold out any longer he pulled back so they both could breathe. She smiled and he returned it. Her blue eyes held him close afraid that this moment wasn’t real. He blinked quickly not wanting to let her out of his sight.

She licked her now pink lips and sighed. "You should be getting home." She whispered loving the nearness of him.

He smiled. "I know, but I’m not leaving you here." He said.

She rolled her eyes but unable to keep the smile off her face. "You can’t stay here all night Jason."

"Why?" He questioned with raised eyebrows the silent laugh dancing behind his eyes.

"Because… because you need sleep."

"And I’ll get it. I can stay in that chair right over there." He shook his head. "Look, I’m not leaving. And Rosie is at Sonny’s tonight keeping Michael up all night probably. Besides I’m still your bodyguard." He stated.

"So what I’m just a job to you now?" She asked daring him to agree with her.

Reaching out he caressed her cheek. Taking a deep breath he sighed. "No… you’re more then my job… so much more." He remarked seriously looking over her face and embedding every detail of it in his mind.

She blushed unable to help it and saw him smile. "Don’t laugh at me." She stated holding the lapels of his jacket and cocking her head to one side.

"I’m not. I’m…" He saw the look that she gave him. "Okay maybe just a little." He remarked licking his lips absently. Leaning down he rubbed his nose with hers and closed his eyes feeling the joy of just being with her this way. He wasn’t concerned at the moment with what lay outside of these doors. All he wanted to think about was her and him and what they were.

She stared into his face while his eyes were still closed; looking at the way his nose was positioned to his mouth wanting to remember everything about this moment. His forehead resting against hers sent shivers through her. Him being so close and wanting to be with her was so comforting to her. He was such a joy to have in her life. He did things to her that drove her crazy. The way he touched her or smiled at her, it sent flutters through her heart and made her ask God how she could ever be this lucky to be with him this way. Leaning into him she rubbed her cheek against his. "I’m so happy." She whispered loving this so much. "I feel so good inside. I feel safe."

"Me too." He replied knowing exactly what she felt and he hoped that it would stay like this.

A moment in time was all that she could have asked for with him and she got it. She got it and she was happy for it but it didn’t mean that she didn’t want more. She loved him. She loved him better then any woman would ever love him. It was the kind of love that took over all rational thought and no it wasn’t always safe or neat but it was there and once ignited there was no putting out the fire that surely erupted. She sighed as he backed away from her still holding her hands in his own. Lifting them to his lips he kissed her fingertips before looking up into her eyes still keeping her hands to his lips.

She smiled through teary eyes. Why was it always like this? How come fate was never on their side? She knew what was coming next. She knew this was where he left her and somehow she was okay with that. She was okay with it because she knew that there would be another moment. Until they were free to love one another like they should have done so long ago, they would have these moments.

"I uh… I have to get home." He stated and she nodded but he didn’t move. His eyes were still locked on hers and he smiled. "Thank you… for the dance." He said softly. Finally he let go of her hands and walked over to the couch picking up his coat, he draped it over his arm. Making his way to the door he turned and around one final time and looked at her standing in the center of the room watching him walk away from her… again. "Good-night." He whispered.

"Night."

He nodded and then was gone. Closing the door firmly behind him he let his body rest against the frame leaning his head back against it he took in a deep breath feeling the erratic beating of his heart.

She walked to the door knowing that he was on the other side. She leaned her body against it letting her back rest against it with her entire weight she closed her eyes and sighed and waited for her heart to return to normal.

Chapter Twenty-nine: The Awakening

She sighed as she snuggled closer to the warm body next to her. It was amazing how bright the sun was shining this morning when last night it was as dark and dreary as she had ever seen it. Opening her eyes slowly she looked up at him. His eyes were closed and she could tell by the sound of his breathing that he was still asleep. Taking her hand she trailed it up the length of his black T-shirt covered abdomen until she reached his cheek and ever so slightly she brushed her fingertips along his warm flesh. It was unreal. He was really here with her. Someone like him actually wanted to be with someone like her. It was amazing.

"Amazing." She whispered to herself.

He stirred slightly and opened his eyes a moment later. He took in the scene around him and then looked down at her. Her face hovered right above his midsection while one hand lay gently on his cheek. He sighed feeling as his hand instinctively held her closer to him around her waist. "What time is it?" He asked his voice was husky with morning sleep but she swore he had never sounded better.

She sighed looking over her shoulder. "A little after six." She remarked.

"It’s early." He stated. Taking in a deep breath he rested his head back on the pillow but kept his eyes open. "What are you doing up?" He questioned.

She shrugged. "I don’t know. I guess I just wanted to make sure that you were really here… with me." She said softly looking at him intensely.

He could see the questions in her eyes. Was this where he really wanted to be? Was he sure about her? Did he want her?

"Yes." Was all he said and she knew that he saw all that she couldn’t ask. Leaning down he placed a kiss on her forehead and stroked her hair while the other made nonsensical patterns over her hospital clad back careful to steer away from her bandages.

She smiled and laughed at how well he was coming to know her. She let her chin come to rest on his stomach as she continued to look up into his face. "I wish we could stay like this don’t you?"

"No… I want you home… and like this." He stated with a small smile that made her tingle all the way down to her toes as his eyes drifted close.

"Yeah?" She asked and he nodded. "And after we get home then what?" She asked.

He cut his eyes to her and smiled seductively before letting them drift together again. "Then I’ll take you…into the kitchen and make you cook for me." He laughed and she hit him playfully in the shoulder.

"Very funny." She mocked.

"Yeah I know." He whispered and she could hear his voice growing soft as he let sleep take him over.

"Jason?" She asked.

"Hmm?" Was all he could manage.

She stared at him. His eyes now closed and his face slightly hidden by the shade of the curtain. His whole body was relaxed and it showed. She couldn’t help but hope that it was because of her. That it was because of her that he felt he could let his guard down and just be open. She always wanted it to be this way with them. Neither one of them ever needing to hide what they felt, not anymore. To be able to be vulnerable and honest and open is all she ever wanted with him. And now they had it. They were together and there was nothing that could stop them. Not A.J., Brenda not even her father would keep them from being together. She sighed because she knew that he was waiting. She had called his name and although his subconscious mind had already traveled down the path toward slumber and his conscience mind was well on its way, it was holding back waiting for her question or statement before drifting away. She took in a deep breath. "Just… sleep well." She said softly.

He gave a sort of nod and tightened his arm around her pulling her closer to him, wanting to feel her weight and warmth pressed against him. "I will."

So would she.

The next time she awoke the sun was fully out and Jason was gone. Looking around she noticed that he had left no trace of himself ever being there. Or was he there to begin with? She brought her hand up to her forehead and moaned. "Oh no. Not another dream about Jason." She said to herself.

"You dream about me?" He asked as he stepped into the room with a wheelchair.

She looked over her shoulder at him with raised eyebrows and blushing red cheeks. She swallowed hard. "Jason? I thought that…" She trailed off silently.

"I uh… just went to get this." He motioned down to the wheelchair.

"A wheelchair?" She asked skeptically.

"Yeah. You were released today but uh… it’s mandatory that you get wheeled out. I thought I save the nurse the trouble and bring it myself. You were still asleep when she came in." He explained feeling somewhat foolish and it showed in his eyes.

She smiled and nodded seeing him babble. It was nice to see that he wasn’t always as smooth as she thought. "I thought that Sonny was coming."

"I told him I would take care of it. I was already down here and everything. There was no point in him making a trip for nothing…Yeah… well you ready to go?" He asked.

"Yeah… just let me get changed and I’ll meet you out there."

He nodded and watched as she headed for the bathroom. He sighed and put his face in his upturned palms. The things that she did to him. He never knew he knew how to rant until her.

A few moments later she emerged from the bathroom. She sighed looking at him. "I’m all ready."

He nodded and waited.

"What?" She asked.

"The chair."

"You’re not really going to make me get in the chair are you?"

"Look I told the nurse that I would wheel you out of here. I can’t… I can’t go back on a promise." He smiled.

She shook her head. "Okay… I’ll get in the chair on one condition."

He sighed resting his hands on his hips lazily.

She took a moment to just stare at him. "I’ll get in the chair if you promise to race me out of here as fast as you can."

"Done." He replied without hesitation.

She laughed as she hopped in the chair and he rolled her out into the hallway.

"We’re not going to crash into some old man or some unsuspecting nurse are we?" She asked only half jokingly.

He shrugged. "We might… might not."

Looking over her shoulder and up at him she met his eyes. "I’m not going to hurt you though." He stated.

They held a stare for a moment longer then usual and she sighed. "I know." She whispered.

"Hold on." He instructed and without hesitation he raced her down the hall her laughter and excited squeals following them out.