Courtney: That's the first time you've ever just come right out
and said it.
8/11/03
Alcazar tells Courtney Jason is dead…
Courtney: No. No, you murdering bastard! I swear to God, if
Sonny doesn't kill you, I'm going to kill you myself. No –
8/18/03
Courtney dreams of Jason and their baby while miscarrying…
Courtney: Are you ever going to stop looking at her?
Jason: I didn't know I could be this happy.
Courtney: I did.
Jason: I thought
the best day of my life was when you told me you were pregnant, but this is so
much better. Yeah. This is our little girl. She's the most important thing
that'll ever happen to us.
8/19/03 Jason rescues Courtney from South America…
8/20/03 Courtney
pushes Jason away…
Courtney: I'm so sorry, I just -- I want to make love to you.
I'm just not ready.
Jason: It's ok. It is, courtney. Just take all the time you
want.
Courtney: Ok, but, jason, it's not you. I just --
jason: I -- i know you just went through hell, not knowing what
alcazar might do from one minute to the next.
Courtney: It was harder than you know.
Jason: I just want you to be well again. And safe. I love you.
Courtney: I love you, too.
8/26/03
Courtney tells Jason about the miscarriage…
Jason: It happened. And it hurts. But I know that I can't
possibly understand what you're going through. And I know that I'm going to
have to give you as much time as you need to get better. I'm not going to rush
you.
Courtney: God, I love you so much.
Jason: I love you, too. You know, some people never get to feel
that.
Courtney: Thank you for taking me here.
Jason:
I'm just trying to tell you that -- that losing something matters. But what we
have left matters more.
8/29/03 Jason and Courtney make up after Courtney lashes out at him...
Jason: But I'm selfish because I still want you in my life, even if it's dangerous for you.
Courtney: That's what I want too.
Jason: I love you so much.
Courtney: I love you too. And I need you. God Jason you're everything to me.
9/8/03 Courtney opens up to Jason about the baby blanket and he tells her they are going away together...
Jason: Maybe something I did or -- I don't know -- didn't do or said made you doubt me. But whatever happened, I just -- I want you to know that there's no question in me about you. I love you, and I'm not going anywhere.
Courtney: None of this is about you, jason. It's -- it's about me being crazy inside.
Jason: You remember when we were trapped in the snow? And we said that we were going to go away together? We were going to pick a beach, watch the sun set. But we never got the chance because things kept coming up that always seemed more important. But right now, nothing is more important than us. So will you go away with me?
9/09/03 At the island, Jason assures Courtney he will always love her...
Courtney: So anyway, I do whatever I can think of to try to hold on. I mean, I -- I try to fix every problem. I avoid every fight. I try to make everything perfect so that I don't lose you, but -- but when I had the miscarriage, I thought that I ruined everything, you know? That our love would vanish. So instead of dreading the pain of losing you, I just -- I pushed you away.
Jason: I hated that we were fighting. And I hated to see that you were in pain. But I never thought about leaving once. You know what? Maybe -- you know, maybe our future isn't what we thought. But we still have a life together. Ok? [she nods] And whatever happens -- I mean, if you can't -- if you can't trust anything else, just trust that I love you.
9/10/03 Courtney tells Jason about the painkillers and Jason gives her a massage to ease her pain...
Jason: Look, I -- I'm going to tell you that, you know, you're a strong person and i never want to take that away from you, but the risks that i ask you not to take have to do with my work because i don't want you to get hurt. But I never want you to doubt yourself because all the ways that you believe in yourself are -- are part of what makes me love you.
9/17/03 Jason assure Courtney that everything will work out with the hit n run...
Courtney: And what if you find out that i did it?
Jason: If. If you did, we'll handle it. Don't worry, it's going to be all right, ok?
9/25/03 Jason tells Courtney he would have covered up the hit n run if Alcazar hadn't...
Jason: What are you talking about? You didn't walk away from that accident. You were willing to go to jail for it. I'm the one who couldn't let you. If alcazar hadn't arranged that coverup, i was going to. So if you're feeling guilty, you blame me. You know, sometimes I think about when -- you know, when you were stripping at the oasis and i was guarding you and how much you hated it. But you made yourself get through it because a.J. Was your husband and you loved him. And I wonder how many things you get through because of me. You know, I think about how often I leave you waiting and, you know, I don't say where I've been, how much i can't tell you, and how you gave up your job at kelly's for me.
Courtney: Wasn't that great of a job.
10/9/03 Jason whisks Courtney off to France...
Jason: You're easy for me to love. No one had to tell me how or that I should. I just do, and it -- and it feels right.
10/10/03 Jason asks Courtney marry him and their wedding begins...
Jason: Come on. This is our chance. This is our place. Courtney Matthews, will you do me the honor of becoming my wife?
Courtney: My answer is the same as it was yesterday and will be tomorrow. Yes.
10/13/03 Jason and Courtney become Mr. & Mrs. Morgan...
Courtney: You know, I remember the first time I ever saw you. You were sitting at a table in Kelly's and you had the deepest eyes and the kindest smile I'd ever seen. Any you know, I knew, I know you won't believe me, but I did, I knew that somehow you were gonna change my life forever.
Jason: Well, I do. I believe that.
10/14/03 Jason and Courtney discuss having a family...
Courtney: I mean, this is our time, Jason, just the two of us. We're free to do whatever we want. And we can decide about children in a few years together.
Jason: Yeah, and when we get there, if -- you know, if you need treatments, or surgery, whatever it is, I'll -- I'll be with you.
10/15/03 Jason and Courtney come home and discuss S&C...
Jason: Do you -- do you feel trampled?
Courtney: No. But I do feel a little crowded. I mean, jeez, we just got married, and everything's already about sonny and carly. I love them, I do, but it's like we automatically give them a free pass. And they get to say and do whatever they want, even if it means compromising our time together. I don't know, maybe I'm being selfish, but I just -- I feel like we need to carve out a little piece of life just for the two of us.
Jason: No, you know, you're not being selfish. We just got back. You're right.
10/24/03 Jason is by Court's bedside after her car crash trying to get Carly help...
Jason: You know, I heard the crash. And you screamed right before the car went off the road, and there was nothing but static and the sound of the rain. And I thought, you know, what if I never hear her voice again? So don't ever worry about bothering me, ok? Just tell me where you're going. Tell me -- tell me what you're thinking. Make me hear you so I'll always be able to find you, ok?
10/27/03 Jason and Courtney hold baby Morgan...
Jason: And this is your aunt, Courtney Morgan and she wants to meet you.
Courtney: Oh -- oh, he's beautiful.
10/28/03 Jason and Courtney bring Morgan home...
Courtney: Do you think we have everything we need? I mean, maybe you should go get some more formula.
Jason: I don't know. Do you think we don't have enough? Why are you so nervous about this?
[Morgan gurgles]
courtney: Oh, what are you thinking, morgan? Oh, what do you think? Do you think i'm worrying too much about you? [she takes him upstairs] You're just so beautiful and perfect. Oh, we are going to take such good care of you, sweetheart. Oh, yes, we are. You're going to be so happy and loved, safe.
10/31/03 Courtney searches dead bodies looking for Jason...
Courtney: This was why Sonny wanted me to stay away from you Jason. Because knew this was going to happen. Cause he knew the night was going come when I thought that I lost you, the night was going to come that you come home with a bullet proof vest. The night was going to come that the vest didn't work! The night that I lose you forever! Oh Jason!
11/4/03 Courtney takes the boys to Haye's Landing...
Jason: Are you mad at me for almost getting shot?
Courtney: No, jason, I -- i love you just as much as ever. But you know what? I finally see the truth. You can't change who you are or what you do. It's a part of you, and your life is not safe for children.
11/7/03 Jason shows up at Courtney's door in Haye's Landing...
Courtney: Oh my god. Oh I missed you.
Jason: I missed you too.
Courtney: Oh my god. I hate this Jason. I hate this, not falling asleep in your arms every night, you being so angry.
Jason: You know I love you. I can't turn that off, no matter how angry I get.
11/10/03 Jason and Courtney discuss things and make up...
Courtney: Our trip to france. We were so happy at the chateau. Look, I want you to know i don't regret any of it. And now, I know right now we don't agree and things are hard. But, jason, I love you. Ok, I -- i took michael and morgan to safety, but I didn't leave our marriage. I never will.
Jason: I won't leave, either.
11/13/03 Jason brings Courtney and the boys home...
Jason: You and the kids are coming home with me tonight.
11/19/03 Jason and Courtney bump into Brian in the Park...
courtney: I mean, maybe it's because I came from a broken home and grew up missing my dad. I want to -- I want to protect michael and morgan, you know, give them all the love and support they could possibly need. Is that so bad?
Jason: I know you're doing this out of love.
Courtney: Ok. Then can we just let it go? I mean, I've just gotten home and I missed you so much.
Jason: And I missed you, too.
11/24/03 Jason wants to make love to his wife and does...
11/26/03 Courtney leaves Jason...
Courtney: No. There was no crime, ok? I'll -- I'll remember that just in case anyone ever asks again. It doesn't matter what alcazar did to me as long as the code isn't broken. No cops allowed, no going through the justice system. No. Instead, you guys just go after each other with guns and bombs. And if somebody's wife gets shot in the head or somebody's baby dies, well, hey, it's just the cost of doing business, right?
Jason: I know -- I know that you're upset about the baby, ok, but this has nothing to --
Courtney: Don'T. Don't. I know the rules that we live by, and I promise that i can handle them. I just need a little time.
12/1/03Courtney moves into Kelly's...
Jason: I don't want -- I don't want to lose you.
Courtney: I still love you, jason. That's not the issue. It's just I -- i can't handle the life that you live, what you think of as being right and wrong. I mean, I saw you stand aside while -- while you let sonny wreck not only himself, but carly and michael and morgan. I don't know how to compromise on that.
Jason: Isn't that what marriage is all about? I know things aren't always perfect. Sometimes -- sometimes, people disagree, they get mad. But if they love each other, you know, they find a way to hold on through the rough spots.
12/3/03 Courtney takes off her rings...
Jason: Is there something you want to tell me?
Courtney: Yeah. I love you, and I miss you so much. You know, I've been thinking about all the times that we spent together away from your work, and I swear, jason, those are the most completely happy times of my life.
Jason: And for me, too.
12/4/03 Courtney gives Jason an alibi...
Courtney: I know. I know. I told him that you were with me last night in my room above kelly'S.
Jason: I told him the same thing.
Courtney: But you couldn't be sure what I'd say.
Jason: I knew that you would try to cover for me. You know I trust you.
12/10/03 Jason and Courtney return to their wedding spot...
Jason: You know, I vowed to love you for better or for worse. That's a promise not to give up, and I'm not going to.
12/17/03 Jason and Courtney decide to get a divorce...
Courtney: You know what's funny? My mom has drilled it into me since before I could walk that I should marry a man with money, and I did. You could've given me anything I wanted -- cars, jewelry. But in the end, I didn't want anything except for us to last. At least the divorce won't be a fight because I always hated fighting with you.
Jason: There's nothing to fight about because I love you. It was an honor to be married to you, even for a little while.
12/29/03 Jason kisses Courtney outside of Kelly's...
Courtney: Why did you do that?
Jason: Because talking doesn't do us any good. You know, I wanted us to feel the way we used to feel.
Courtney: I love kissing you, jason. And I love you, but that doesn't change anything.
1/8/04 Jason tells Courtney he will always protect her...
Jason: If somebody hurt you or used you or made you sad, I'd kill them without a second thought.
Courtney: To protect me.
Jason: I love you. And I want -- I want you to be happy, even if you can't be happy with me.
1/19/04 A drugged Jason tries to make love to Courtney at the LOFT...
Jason: Courtney, Courtney I love you, I love you, you're my whole life.
1/21/04 Jason and Courtney come this close to reuniting...
Courtney: I don't know, I just -- I thought being with him would make me feel less alone, but it didn't. I didn't have feelings for him. God, jason, all my feelings -- they're for you. I miss you. I mean, I think about you all the time. I -- i imagine being with you, having conversations with you, kissing you, making love to you. You're a part of me. You always will be.
Jason: I feel the same.
1/23/04 Courtney shoots Brian...
1/30/04 Jason is relieved when Courtney doesn't confess to Brian's shooting...
Jason: I was waiting for the cops to call and tell me you'd been arrested.
Courtney: I couldn't do it. I tried. I went to the hospital intending to tell brian everything. But all I could hear was you asking me not to. Look, jason, i haven't been able to give you much of what you've asked of me. I couldn't give you a child. I couldn't stay with you forever like i promised on our wedding day. But I can give you this -- I won't confess to the shooting.
Jason: Thank you.
2/10/04 Courtney and Jason find each other in the PC Hotel Fire...
2/13/04 Jason gives up his helicopter number for Courtney...
Courtney: I don't want this.
Jason: Just -- just don't argue, ok? At least this way I know that you're safe.
Courtney: You have to promise me, jason, that you're going to live through this. You have to promise me that no matter what it takes, you are going to walk out of here alive.
Jason: I promise.
2/17/04 Jason comes out of the fire alive and into Courtney's arms...
Courtney: Oh, my god. I didn't think that you were going to get out.
Jason: I'm ok. It's ok.
Courtney: God, i love you so much.
Jason: I love you, too.
2/18/04 Jason and Courtney argue at Brian's grave...
Courtney: Brian was just doing his job. And if you ask me, it is a hell of a lot better to swear to protect innocent people than it is to make more money than you can spend by smuggling and doing god knows what else. We dug brian's grave together, jason, you and me. God, this story always ends with blood and guns. And someday you're going to die that way, too. Sonny is going to stand up at your funeral and he's going to say that you were a loyal friend who died with honor. Well, I don't think that it's honorable, and i can't watch. Brian missed his family every day. And that's how i'm going to miss you.
Jason: You really think i'm going to die? And you don't want to see it? Is that what you're saying?
Courtney: Maybe I'm wrong. You know, I hope i am. I hope that you live to be an old man, jason, and i hope that you are happy. But I can't -- I can't do this anymore. I can't -- i can't be a part of your life. I have to make a life of my own.
2/24/04 Jason and Courtney negotiate business now that Court owns the docks...
Courtney: Well, it's not what i expected, but I'm sure we can work something out. I can give you pretty much the same deal -- with some stipulations. The first sign of violence or illegal activity, and i pull the leases.
Jason: So you're saying that even if -- if someone shot at us, we're going to lose our lease?
Courtney: That's right.
2/26/04 Jason and Courtney spend time with the boys...
Michael: Are you and uncle jason back together?
Courtney: No.
Michael: But you guys don't fight.
Courtney: Well, there really isn't any need for us to fight. Just we realized that both of our lives are very different and they're just too different for us to stay together. But your uncle jason and i, we still care about each other.
3/18/04 Courtney finds Sam at Jason's PH...
Jason: Well, why'd you need to see me?
Courtney: It was nothing. Carly and I had an argument, and I just wanted to get your opinion.
Jason: Do you want to talk about it now?
Courtney: No, it's probably not a good idea.
Jason: All right. I mean, if you need something, you can always come to me.
3/31/04 Jason is pissed Carly asks Courtney to make nice with Lorenzo...
Courtney: Carly wants me to make an effort with you.
Lorenzo: I'm willing to try if you are.
Jason: Hey, get away from Courtney.
4/1/04 Courtney catches Jason unzipping Sam's dress...
Courtney: Get the hell away from my husband. That didn't take long.
Sam: What are you talking about?
Courtney: What do you think Sonny's going to do when he finds out that you've been trying to seduce his best friend?
4/2/04 Jason and Courtney can't settle on a divorce agreement...
Courtney: Money doesn't fix anything. I mean, yeah, it's great to feel secure and provided for, but it doesn't make the loss any smaller. I just -- I can't believe that our marriage has boiled down to a few pieces of paper that read like a business contract. You know, what's missing is us, jason. You know, what we had, the feelings we shared. I mean, there's no trace of how much we loved each other and always --
Jason: Always will.
4/9/04 Jason and Courtney have dinner at the loft in order to "sign the divorce papers"...
Jason: Well, I'm sorry that i caused you so much pain, that i brought you into a dangerous world. I should have been stronger and left you alone. Instead, i was selfish.
Courtney: Oh, jason, you are the most unselfish person i know.
Jason: Loving you, courtney, was selfish. Convincing myself that i could make you happy was selfish.
Courtney: Why? Why is that selfish?
Jason: Because I wanted to be with you no matter what it cost me -- or you.
Courtney: You made me happy, jason, happier than I have ever been.
4/12/04 Journey reunite for about a half an episode...
Jason: Ok. Um -- you know, after I left, I just -- I started thinking about emily and nikolas, and how, you know, one day they were together and the next they weren't. I just think we're missing a major chance.
Courtney: Not missing, throwing away.
Jason: And, look, I understand why the divorce makes sense. My life is risky, it's unpredictable, and i can't guarantee that i won't -- that i won't get killed, but I can do everything that I possibly can to keep safe. I realize that might not even be good enough, but i do know this. However much time I have -- if i die tomorrow or if I live to be 100 -- I want to spend every moment i can with you.
Courtney: That's all i've ever wanted.
4/13/04 Courtney stops Jason from killing Alcazar...
Jason: You -- you did this to me?
Courtney: Come on, Jason, killing Alcazar would've made everything worse. They would've started looking for him eventually, and then they would've come to you first. You know it.
Jason: You -- you knocked me out to save Alcazar?
Courtney: No, I did it to save you and Carly. I don't want the two of you charged with murder!
4/14/04 Jason signs the divorce papers...
Jason: You called the police on your own brother. And you still think you're right. I guess we don't belong together. We're too different.
Courtney: We love each other, jason. You said that you would love me forever, and i feel the same way. That doesn't just disappear.
4/30/04 Jason and Courtney visit Michael in the hospital...
Jason: If courtney and I were ever to get back together, it's not going to be because of one of your plans.
Michael: So you might get back together?
Courtney: Look, I know that you want everybody to get back together.
Michael: Is that wrong?
Jason: You need to think about getting well, ok?
Michael: Ok. But don't you want everything to be like it was before?
Jason: Nothing can be like it was before, buddy.
5/7/04 Rain Kiss 2...
courtney: Jason, do you really hate alcazar so much you would be willing to spend the rest of your life in prison?
Jason: I don't give a damn about alcazar! You were my wife. Courtney, I loved you more than anything. 30 minutes before it happened, you said you still loved me and you wanted to get back together.
Courtney: I do! I did want to get back together with you, jason. God, i practically begged you not to sign the divorce papers, but you did it anyway and closed the door in my face!
Jason: So just leave it closed, please. Ok? I can't freaking do this anymore. I can't have you yelling at me one minute and then crying for me the next. I can't stop being mad at you any more than i can stop loving you, and I don't want to fight anymore! This is not what our relationship was. It just keeps getting worse.
5/26/04 Jason walks in on Courtney dancing with Jax...
Jason: Courtney should do whatever makes her happy.
5/27/04 Jason lies to Courtney about Sam being pregnant with his child...
Courtney you slept with sam to push sonny and carly back together, didn't you?
Jason: Yeah, something like that.
Courtney: God. Oh. So, what, she came on to you, and you let it happen to show sonny what kind of woman she really is to make the choice between his family and sam clear? And then sonny and carly got back togheher, anyhow, so your sleeping with sam was a wasted effort. Till she showed up pregnant.
Jason: It was the last thing that I ever expected.
Courtney: Yeah, it's kind of crazy how things happen. You and I loved each other, and our baby wasn't meant to be. And then you and sam have a meaningless fling, and just like that, you're having a baby.
5/31/04 Jason seen Courtney kissing Jax and Courtney finds out Jason is going to marry Sam...
Jax: Oh you didn't know? Yeah, jason and sam are getting married.
Courtney: Of course you and sam are getting married. You're -- you're going to have a family.
Jax: Yeah, and we all know that you have such traditional values --
Courtney: Jax!
Jason: I came to tell you myself, but you --
6/3/04 Jason and Sam show up at Courtney's charity event and he slugs Jax...
6/7/04 Courtney returns Jason's check to the foundation...
Jason: I'm going to be ok.
Courtney: You used to want more than "ok."
Jason: You know, if I get to see Michael and Morgan, it's a great day. I do my job well. I don't really think about what might've been.
Courtney: I guess that's why this is all easier on you. You usually don't think about what might've happened. Oh, anyway, I guess there's no point in looking back, right?
6/15/04 Jason and Courtney share a jail cell after Jason tricks Jason into coming to Italy...
Jason: Yeah, you know, that -- that beach i used to talk about, it's just, like, five minutes from here. And that ancient roman temple, the one that's, you know, offshore, underwater --
Courtney: Oh, yeah, yeah, I remember you telling me about that. I didn't realize that we were in the same town you described.
Jason: Maybe you can, you know, come back sometime.
Courtney: Yeah, well, I've always wanted to travel, you know, take off for a year, go wherever I wanted, see places i'd never seen, and when i got bored, i'd just move on.
Jason: Why don't you? You got the money. You wouldn't be leaving anybody behind.
Courtney: Yes, i would.
7/15/04 Courtney gives Jason her condolences over Lila's death...
Courtney: Jason. I -- I heard about lila. I'm so sorry.
Jason: You know she was in pain almost all the time?
Courtney: No, I had no idea.
Jason: Most people didn't. She never complained.
Courtney: But you knew.
8/5/04 Jason bursts into the loft after someone shoots through Courtney's window...
Jason: Well, whoever did this is long gone. One of my guys saw him take off in a blue sedan.
Courtney: You're having my place watched?
8/6/04 Courtney tries to warn Jason that the cops are setting him up...
Courtney: Ok, listen to me. Jax went to the police, ok? He's going to tell them everything -- how faith shot him, how she tried to kill me and jax. He's going to tell them that you went after her, ok? Just can you -- can you just drop this? Can you call it off? Please, just let the police arrest her and let it be done with.
Jason: Courtney, you need to leave.
Courtney: Did you hear a word that i said? Jason, this is a trap!
Jason: Look, I appreciate your warning, but I know what i'm doing.
Courtney: Ok, fine. Fine -- you know what? If you want to throw your life away, fine, do it. I was stupid to try and stop you.
8/11/04 Jason sees Jax&Courtney kissing outside the loft...
Jax: Well, then, why don't you go back to Sonny's mistress and leave Courtney alone.
Jason: So you monitor Courtney’s guests now?
Jax: You're not a guest. Guests are invited. What's it going to take for you to get the message, Jason? Courtney's through with you.
Jason: Jax speaks for you?
Courtney: No, he doesn't. Look, Jason, I just -- I think -- I think you should just leave us alone.
8/12/04 Jason&Courtney discuss the tension between them...
Courtney: Hey, i know that we can't be together without one of us losing who we are. But when you love someone, it doesn't just go away.
Jason: I know. It doesn't.
Courtney: Yeah, there's like this deep feeling just gnawing at your heart. And sometimes I bury it, but it always comes back.
Jason: You're beautiful. And you have a good heart and I just knew when we broke up that somebody else was going to see it and want to be with you.
Courtney: But do i really want to be with them?
Jason: It makes sense that you'd move on. But I don't have to like it.
8/18/04 Jason&Courtney remember their unborn child on the anniversary of her death...
Jason: I remember all of it. You know, how you -- how you looked lying in the clinic. You were asleep, but they said that you'd been sedated, but I could tell that you'd been crying. And I remember carrying you out, driving back to the plane. We took off. I sat there holding you. All I wanted was for you just to wake up and know I was with you. I mean, I left for a second, and that's -- that's when you opened your eyes. You must have still thought that you were alone.
Courtney: You were holding me before I could think anything. Telling me that I was going to be safe and that everything was ing to be ok. Is that what you want?
Jason: I don't understand.
Courtney: It's just such an ordinary word, you know. "How are you feeling?" "Ok." "How were the movies?" "Ok." Anno one reaches a higher level of consciousness, but no one gets their hearts broken, either. My life is ok without our baby. I guess yours is, too.
Jason: Yeah. Yeah.
Courtney: You know, I do miss what we could have had. Not -- not every day. Not all the time. This morning, I woke up and I thought about being more than just ok. And I -- I remembered how it felt to be carrying your child.
Jason: Look, I don't -- I don't know if that kind of pain gets easier over time when you just -- you know, you bury it deeper. But I want it to be easier for you. And if it helps to know someone else remembers, I do. And I always will.
Courtney: It helps a lot.
8/20
Courtney: I need you to know I didn't sleep with jax.
Jason: You -- you don't need to explain. It doesn't matter anymore.
Courtney: It matters to me.
Jason: Why? I mean, what difference does it really make? You know, we're over. You have a right to sleep with whoever you want to sleep with.
Courtney: I didn't sleep with jax.
Jason: And I told you before, courtney, that I'm glad for any happiness that you can find, but you need to stop giving me updates on your relationship with jax. It's too hard watching you move on. Ok, so whatever you're doing or you're not doing, please, from now on just keep it to yourself.
To be continued...
